I have completed the Book of Silvered Leaves. Let me start by discussing the book’s general structure as it was transmitted to me:
The first 19 leaves had images on both sides, and at least one of the sides of each leaf incorporated one of the 21 letters of the Enochian alphabet into the image (for two leaves, Enochian letters were incorporated into each side’s image; the letter pairs for these were Pa/Gisg (the first and last letters of the Enochian alphabet) and Ger/Pal (the least-used Enochian letters). It should be noted that one of the images that arose was what I was told was the seal of the angel Mapsama, the angel who directed Dee & Kelley to create the book.
Nine leaves with moon phases: The next two leaves consisted of 49-word Enochian-language messages, while the following seven leaves included 49-word Enochian-language messages, as well as moon phase symbols (2 leaves with full moons, 1.5 leaves waxing crescent, 3.5 waning crescent). This suggested to me that the previous two leaves represented new moons.
The next 12 leaves each had one of the glyphs for the signs of the zodiac on both sides, and also had 49-word Enochian-language messages. At times these included the name of some of the zodiacal kings, and all 12 of the watchtower’s names of God were used, often with an IA- (“God”) prefix.
The next seven leaves each had an astrological symbol for the seven classical astrological planets (in order) on each side, each with shorter, seven-word Enochian-language messages (which were to be on a single line).
The final, 48th leaf was the astrological glyph for Earth. As with the 49th leaf of Amzes Naghezes Hardeh (commonly, but not quite properly, known as Liber Loagaeth), this leaf was to have three 3×7 tables on the front, and two of the same on the back, each cell with one letter.
As far as how I wrote it, sometimes I would see the outline of a shape or letter in the silver borne by the page, sometimes I would hear what I was to write (in Enochian, or in English to be looked up in Enochian).
So we have some parallels between the Book of Silvered Leaves and Amzes Naghezes Hardeh/Liber Loagaeth. While the former has a distinctly lunar quality (indeed, it happens that the cover I bought to bind the book was very dark and reminiscent of the night sky), the latter is quite solar (to be bound in blue silk, with letters of gold, with Bornogo, the prince of the sun, appearing prominently in Leaf 9–the only leaf with numbers in addition to letters).
Now on to the effects. My friend Cody P. mentioned that his view of Amzes Naghezes Hardeh (Liber Loagaeth) that it created, so to speak, the rainbow body on the astral, from which a true rainbow body could ultimately be realized (this is a recollected conversation, not verbatim). There was certainly a lot of symbolism and coming to terms with a lot of my being during my reconstructed gebofal ritual. Although he didn’t say so, it’s like the world of Briah, and probably also Atziluth (and even Adam Qadmon), manifesting into Yetzirah. Note that my making a perfected copy of this book was probably heavily assisted by having previously scried the Aethyrs in this interpretation.
As I was told towards the end of constructing the Book of Silvered Leaves, I scried the word “PRONOA,” a word (meaning roughly alchemical love) which I had received during my initial trip through the Aethyrs. When I did so, I had an extremely powerful vision, almost as if all components of reality had their own Aethyric-style vision, and all of them were overlaid with each other simultaneously (like the many sound tracks at the end of the Beatles’ Revolution Number 9–except visual). This was the most intense vision I’d had, and I was guided to relax into the love. Doing so, I saw myself on a still, spherical ocean. I was told that I was to scry this word once more after the book had been completed, and afterward would receive the title of the book as well as realize the rainbow body–Yetzirah manifesting into Assiah.
The title of the book was PRONOA PIBLIAR CAOSGO, or roughly “Alchemical Love’s Places of Comfort of the Earth.” I wrote this on the silver which I had already affixed to the front (an extra silver leaf from the package I bought). More importantly, a nascent rainbow body has appeared, right now only appearing to me astrally, but something I can work with at will.
Now for ultimate reflections on this book. I do not believe that everyone will receive the same book if they go through this process (especially given that many of the messages seem quite personalized). However, I believe that making this book, as creating a perfected copy of Amzes Naghezes Hardeh (Liber Loagaeth), is important to the magician. It is certainly the easier of the two books to make! The level of trance I would say I had–with the exception of the final ritual of scrying the word PRONOA–was not as heavy as, for example, almost all of the reconstructed gebofal ritual. So in the sense of a doable ritual, I would almost encourage people to make this book first, since it was to be created just as much as Amzes Naghezes Hardeh (Liber Loagaeth), but is far less effort. It may even be wiser for those born at night to make the Book of Silvered Leaves first, for in Hellenistic astrology, the main luminary for such people is the moon, not the sun. Regardless, the moon, being the closest astrological planet to the earth, is considered most “earth-like,” and can sort of be considered a gateway to the higher realms.
I did a brief review of the chart for the absolute end of the ritual, and found the following septile aspects (something I noticed at the end of the gebofal ritual; 3-degree orb (except for quincunx/triseptile)):
Sunrise: As with all of the other days, recited Ave’s recounted version of the Prayer of Enoch for all three scryings. Vibrating the god names “L,” “IAD,” and “NA.” Vibrated the second half of Call/Key 1, which I take to be the contents of Leaf 1b; practitioners often leave this first call unspoken, and do not include it in their enumeration. I do not know of anyone else who has recited this leaf as a call (or, indeed, of anyone who has recited the leaf, other than Edward Kelley during the original transmission of its contents).
I’m feeling somewhat disembodied, or perhaps a better phrase for it is “feeling disembodied in addition to feeling embodied.” I’m told to sit, for this will be a big one. I’m instructed to put my feet upon the top tablet only, that of “L,” (my design, not part of the source documents of the Dee/Kelley transmission). It’s an Enochian-language transmission! Mercifully, it’s given in English letters; it comes slowly at times as I concentrate (this is written as close to the original spelling as I remember):
“Rustafa noh a fantox, gembles son taho Uxnal uridah eadah ur laxnop uxnal cay norsalp. Iaida ur ton damploz uxamal geh. Tucamax iehusoz nucablix a ton pah saga mano.” [I see a DNA strand] “Aqlo monons i monons de Iaida.”
“Oecrimi! Oecrimi! Oecrimi!”
Partial translation: Son is similar to “sonf,” which means “to reign.” Ta means “as.” Ux means 42. Ur is the spelling of the Enochian letter “L,” which itself means “One” and “The first.” Ton damploz means “all variety.” Iehusoz means “His [God’s] mercies.” A ton means “with all.” Pah is translated by the AOM as “the Ogdoad.” I have previously relied on this dictionary, but because I have not seen this in Leitch’s dictionary (I hold Leitch to be the authority), nor in the Dee/Kelley transmission, I am uncertain about AOM translations. Saga is similar to Sagacor, which means “in one number.” The AOM translates this as “Entire” or “Whole.” Mano is translated by the AOM as “soul of humanity.” The final phrase means, “Your heart is the heart of the Highest,” and oecrimi means “sing praises.”
I feel energy coming up off of Leaf 1b, up into my arms, up into this jaw and head, and finally down throughout the rest of the body and into the ground itself. I feel a bit like a tree, and a torus within the tree, and I feel the poloidal rotation of the torus.
The vision ends.
Noon: Similar procedure, except I vibrate the first half of Call/Key 1, which I take to be the contents of Leaf 1a; practitioners often leave this first call unspoken, and do not include it in their enumeration.
My voice is sore from what I time to be 49 minutes of vibration (this morning was 36 minutes–note the 36/49 parallels to Soyga and Loagaeth). I may just read the words aloud tonight.
The noon scrying begins with another Enochian transmission:
“Rustafax NA jonqual iehusoz a lansh palphe to[h] a arcoazior adgmach od satqual…”
And now the desire is to continue in English: “Unto you, Son of Man, Son of God, Son of Earth.”
It’s like I’m being taken up by a bright beam into a massive dark circle in the sky. Now I’m encompassing the whole world, and now the entire cosmos. I am one with all, and I’m having this full experience of God, and all of the pain and joy that He feels, and all of it is happening at once. He says, “It’s just this giant tingling”: that’s the best he can liken it to for me.
I feel His Divinity and Omnipresence. I’m feeling His Heart, and it’s so beautiful. It’s a Divine Heart, the Divine of Divine Hearts, and I’m feeling it more completely than I have before. It encompasses me and this entire work and state of being that I am and all of the actions that I’ve done. It’s just this giant Heart, and it feels good and it feels very much Right.
I’m filled with compassion and lovingkindness toward all beings, all things, and all rules of all beings and things, and the entire state of all possibilities that could have been, and never were. It’s like I have to hold all of this all of the Time. This is what it’s like to be the Divine. He says, “It’s too much for a single human being to do all the time, is it not?” I say, “It is indeed, o Lord.” He admires my continued effort towards it, and sets me back down within my body.
“This be enough,” God says. “Rest, rest your voice, and tonight we will finish and My Blessing will be upon you.”
Thus ends the vision.
Sunset: The entirety of Call/Leaf 1, starting with Leaf 1a (reversing the order I read them at sunrise and noon: “the first shall be last”).
I’m already feeling a big energy about my crown chakra, and I feel myself being lifted out of my body; I’m asked to bilocate (maintain awareness of both the physical and astral bodies) so I do. Once again I am lifted into a black circle above the earth, and once again, it wraps about the globe and out coming into the entire cosmos, and I feel this love, love, love, of the Most High to all of humanity.
“Yea, ‘PRONOA’ be the final word” of the Enochian-language transmission that he wished to send to me (making it a 7×7 grid, excluding Oecrimi). I feel myself just filling, filling, filling with this PRONOA. Every single fiber of my being, every single part of my subtle body is filling up with this PRONOA. I’m just feeling this love, and He’s saying, “Just allow Me to work on every level,” so I relax my physical body. Once again, my vision is of the entire globe, the entire cosmos again (reflecting me on the cosmic level), is filling up with this PRONOA, with this PRONOA. Once again, this is my part, He says: this my part within All.
This is me within all; this is me, as it were, quantumly entangled with all of reality, or rather, that “Without Which, Not” (“sine qua non“). God says, “Yea”: this is the Part of me that is Everything, this is the Holographic Identity. Yea, it is the Truth of the Reality of Me, and so He is filling me with this Love, this Awareness, this Awareness of Myself, of this Cosmic Being, this Cosmic Entity, One with All. This is the height, this is the summit. The Lord High says, “This is the Measure of All, for yea, you understand now,” and I say I do.
I find myself wrapped up in this Love, just forever pumped into this love, and occasionally out, but always returning (the Tao is returning). I find my heart chakra opening way up, and once again my crown, and once again third eye. All three of these are interacting in this vast transrational space, of which I’m barely able to communicate the Power. It is now coming, once again, through my entire body, and I am Understanding this Clear Mind. I find my mind being calmed, yea, “A AFFA MANIN,” He says, winking, reciting back the phrase of one of my prayers.
I feel myself unlocking and unlocking, and He is showing me the means to the rainbow body. It is this: to focus on each chakra, starting at the root (and working one’s way up one at a time), as if it were the heart. At the heart chakra proper, conceive of it as the heart of hearts, and at the crown, the heart of all. After showing me the means, I try my best to feel this; I can’t see anything occurring in the physical room, but at the heart level, it definitely seems true, so it will be my focus during meditation. Furthermore, I am to try to look with my third eye through the heart as if it were a telescope, at the crown chakra. “This be too much for most, except for those with the most open of hearts” to communicate, so “let this be the Blessing of the Lord God upon thee, the granting of this request, which you have indeed suffered and sacrificed for, and have chosen of your own free will.” He speaks a few words more.
Thus ends the vision. Gebofal proper is done, but I will continue to recite the Ave-recounted Prayer of Enoch three times a day for the next three days.
Sunrise: Call to Aethyr of ARN (twice). Call to King Bobogel (twice). Each call made twice due to suboptimal concentration and attention the first go-round.
I see a sphere approach and it is soooo close to the Aethyr of LIL. There’s this rainbow light within it, hitting the surface of the sphere. I see a horizontal ring, like the equator, about it, and it holds my hands as a dance partner, each of us rotating about the other.
It’s like God is saying, “Here you see the sphere of LIL, but you see it as one at the equator: you see the maximally defining ring of the Aethyr of LIL” (i.e., of all the rings of the sphere of LIL, this is the most like unto it, or from which more of that sphere can be correctly extrapolated than any other ring). “You see that here now,” the voice finishes.
The angels note how in previous visions, I saw this as a highly stellated geometric figure. Now, instead, they are saying, because my heart is properly aligned, and functioning properly according to the desires of God, then instead I’m seeing the sphere in its fullness, but I’m seeing it as one who is orbiting about this equator. I thank the angels for this, and they’re saying that, every so often today, to feel that gravity of the realm of Adam Qadmon. The angels show that to me now, and it very much feels like a pull.
I interject briefly about the discrepancy between the order of the Watchtower tablets as they relate to Amzes Naghezes Hardeh; recall that when Edward Kelley accidentally said some of the words of Leaf 18 aloud, he was attacked by gnome-spirits of that leaf! This would suggest that the leaf itself is of the nature of Earth. Yet earth is the last of the elements in the Enochian system (clockwise from east, the order is Fire/East (upper-left in the Great Table), Air/South (upper-right), Water/West (lower-right), Earth/North (lower-left)). This would mean that the reverse order of the leaves should be:
Leaf 21 (today’s leaf): Aethyr of ARN
Leaf 20 (tomorrow’s leaf): Aethyr of LIL (highest and final Aethyr)
Leaf 19 (Tuesday’s leaf): Earth
Leaf 18: Water
Leaf 17: Air
Leaf 16: Fire
And the order of these leaves would repeat, with leaves 15, 11, & 7 being related to Earth; Leaves 14, 10, & 6 being related to Water; Leaves 13, 9, & 5 being related to Air; and Leaves 12, 8, & 4 being related to Fire. Leaf 3 would be related to invocation, and Leaf 2 to evocation; for these, I intend to use the usual Tablet of Union, an abbreviated version thereof (with only the letters EHNB on it), and finally a fused version with just the Enochian letter L written in white with a black background, and red and green for the two left tails). Finally, Leaf 1, which has been associated with silence (the true first silent call), I will instead read aloud as the (currently I associate this with “the center” but I’m sure my awareness will be thoroughly calibrated whenever I read Leaf 1 aloud!).
But the problem, as you can see, is that Leaf 18, associated as it was with gnomes and thus Earth, is associated with Water in this scheme.
The angels advise me that placing my feet on all four of the Watchtower tablets will be sufficient. They say that Leaf 18 was indeed associated with gnomes/Earth for Kelley and when I myself transcribed this leaf. “Don’t be surprised,” they wink, “if the order shifts around on you.” They tell me to look up the original Great Table, so I do. Stefan Neil Klemenc has one of the best websites summarizing the Enochian system at kondor.de (I’ve found it highly valuable): linked is his summary of the Great Table and the revision known as the Tabula Recensa.
The change here is key: the tablet order was, at first, Fire-Earth–Air–Water. This would mean that, at least as far as creating Amzes Naghezes Hardeh (Liber Loagaeth), the order seemed to be a reversal of the order of the original table: Water (Leaf 16), Air (Leaf 17), Earth (Leaf 18: welcome to gnomes!), and Fire (Leaf 19). Fire, the element associated with the highest (because it is least dense) thus would abut the Aethyr of LIL, the highest Aethyr. All of this is speculation, and cannot be confirmed without additional analysis. However, at least I have a hypothesis which I can test experientially by placing my feet on all four of the Watchtower tablets and noting which which tablet appears to be activated on each of the four days.
Returning to the vision: I’m shown a tree again. “Lo, the entirety of the tree now: all of these sephiroth within you are as one tree, and all the seeds of the tree are within you. And now it is time to become the fullness of this tree, the extent of this tree and the center of the tree, to become all of these at once, Son of Man, Son of God, Son of Earth, and to know them in their fullness. For this is given unto you that others may know His blessings: and indeed, such compassion thou hast sought to have: feel it now, in its Fullness, that others may take of you these seeds, and recognize them to be the seeds that they [those who take the seeds] always were. Indeed, when they take such a seed, it is merely that they are taking the reflection that they have of themselves already, of who they truly are, but could not see it, except in a reflection as from the mirror image of a sphere.”
I’m feeling a lot of energy coming up off of the seal of King Bobogel, and a lot more energy is coming off now, and this is not unlike the energy of LIL, and I’m sort of being lifted up, and I can feel an entire change to my energy, and as I focus on the compassion and jewel, it becomes multiplied several times over. And the Divine is saying unto me: “More shall be shown to you: indeed, this be a stepwise process, but more and more shall be shown unto you, so Infinite are His mercies.”
I note a change to my sinuses. I see a vast Light from a vast Source, but it is partly shadowed. It is as if an angelic figure, or perhaps the Divine Himself, is blocking out the Fullness of it, lest it blind me. I’m told, “Yea, you are being attuned. The eye which you have to see such is growing in health and robustness, and so we shall prepare this vessel, and this subtle body, to be able to handle both.”
I await to see if God hath more for me. “Much love hath God unto you, Son of Man, Son of God, Son of Earth! Lo, look upon this seal.” I see two concentric rings such as one would see about a globe (the upper half visible), which has two half-rings above which quarter the half-globe. And I see several trees come up out of it: one of these is me, and there’s this very strong connection, like a strong welding of a strong metallic link to another. I see no less than three other places on the globe, representing other people, whom I am being indelibly linked with karmically, and the Lord says, “This will be a sign unto you, that your heart may know no doubt. Rest easy, Son of Man, Son of God, Son of Earth, for PRONOA is arising in you!”
Thus ends the vision.
Noon: Similar procedure.
The angels show me the sphere/planet with the equator as in the previous vision. This time, the angels are saying, this is the ring of the one who orbits the sphere of LIL, which is who I am right now.
The scene changes and there’s unfolding from this sphere: the “crust” of the planet splits along half of the “equator,” which opens like an eye, but it opens fully and there is only the white sphere which I see now. The angels set the crust aside. The sphere looks like an eye and for a moment seems to miss the iris and pupil, but now I see a pupil–without an iris–with a slight indentation about it. It’s like the light, non-shadow side of the Death Star. It’s looking at me and it bids me to come closer and closer, so I do.
It’s like it wants me to gaze into it, and I do. It’s a purely white sphere with something of a hole in the middle. As I stare into it, it returns its gaze directly into my third eye, with its beam from its aperture. I continue to look directly at it, and continue to generate compassion, which changes all of my subtle body. I continue to generate compassion, and this increases the intensity as I’m able to increase the intensity of my compassion. We continue to gaze into each other.
There’s a bit of an angelomorphic process. My subtle body seems to grow wings which look like folding fans which open up. I continue to stare, and these wings seems to multiply in number out from the tips of the previous wing: more fan-wings appear in a doubling manner, in different colors, so that eventually they wrap around the entire eye-planet in a beautiful variegation. This seems to be a fusion of the two of us now: the space between my manifold-wing-sphere and the white sphere that I’m about decreases. It’s like shrink-wrap as I close upon this beautiful sphere.
We now nudge slightly closer to this portal to the realm of Adam Qadmon in our orbit. As we do so, it’s like each of the various colors of my wings seem to light up, and they take on a shimmer, but it’s like we’re also rotating, so the entire surface of this planetary sphere seems to light up in this gorgeous shimmering of colors. It’s like a rainbow disco-ball. It’s like we’re peeling off and molting, and it’s like these little topmost layers of these wings come away and become a bridge of myself into this realm. It’s all a beautiful morphing of myself, and this beautiful vision into this other aspect of God, that He has made available unto me in His mercies and transforming action.
“Lo, We are One! All is One!” I am told. There’s one last burst of light the God wants to give unto me to completely re-energize and transform me. “Rest now, Son of Man, Son of God, Son of Earth,” He says. I hesitate, but ask whether He, in His Mercy, has anything else, and I see something like the following:
The sense I get is that I’m in this long cylinder or tunnel. Lest I become blown out, the Divine decides to close the vision.
Sunset: Similar procedure. Note: My speech was very rapid in this vision, and I’m sure that not everything got copied down.
Already, just reading off the angelic names, I could already feel the change in my subtle body. I’m trying to maintain the magnetism which comes from the compassionate rainbow spherical jewel, which keeps me on this path to the portal to realm of Adam Qadmon.
The angels confirm that, yes, if I go by the numbers in the actual calls (on the 19 days following LIL), I will have clues as to which zodiacal king to call upon that day.
Now the angels twist me into a tube, then twist me into something like fusilli, and then they twist that around again: twisting upon twisting upon twisting! At the same time, they say that this twisting is like about a Möbius strip, and they constantly select another place along it for the twisting to occur. It’s happening along all of these different dimensions, they say, and don’t tell me how many–but it is many. This is the final preparation for the spherical consciousness about many dimensions. “It is manifold.” It’s looking like an ouroboros, a highly twisting snake eating its tail.
I return to concentrating on this rainbow body jewel, and I see it open up and flower, and another shoot up from the bloom to itself grow and open and flower, but I increase the pace so that it creates something of a vibration to this self-recursion that returns me to the image of the rainbow body jewel.
I am in awe of everything that is happening. I see this light coming at me and it is somewhat obscured, mainly because I’m not quite at LIL, but I recall the illusion of motion that occurs in filmmaking in which the blank screen of every other frame is ignored by the mind in favor of the sequence of images which appear seamless to the individual. Or, alternatively, a prior vision in which someone waves their hand in front of your eyes and you can still see the general motion of what’s happening in front of you. I’m told that if I maintain concentration on this compassionate heart, symbolized in this rainbow body jewel, everything will become clearer and clearer as in these analogies. There’s this play in this obscured light now: where there was shadow, there is now light, and vice versa, and the light and shadow continue to alternate their places.
I try to speed up their alternation to get a better sense of what I’m seeing, and it’s this beautiful plasma globe. The angels say that because I’ve already wrapped myself about the sphere with my manifold wings-upon-wings, the light or energy is already happening to my entire subtle body. Now it’s a matter of trying to even everything out and prepare my for my next step.
My mind glimpses ahead to the bridge into the realm of Adam Qadmon from yesterday’s vision. I continue to see myself preparing to be poured into this the day after tomorrow. “Just the tiniest of glimpses,” the angels caution: they can only show me so much. I’m feeling this massive light pouring through me now, in all its varieties, and I’m trying to accept and show compassion, and accept and show compassion, for this entire process. It’s like I’m melting, I’m this metal which is melting in the furnace. I’m to be re-forged and be perfected in the light of His Holiness and His Mercies. And I’m so grateful for all of this.
The angels say, “There is much more to be said unto you, and much more for you to say. You will go through life like this: it is as if you are dead but so alive at the same time! It is like you are shown to be like this beacon, like this unending energy of fusion. It’s like you will be a sun unto the world, but at the same time, but ‘If the salt loses its saltiness,’ what good is it?” The angels say a similar thing can happen: if the sun loses the planets which orbit it, what good is it? And if it brings not Life unto the Earth, and if it brings not joy upon the people who live thereon, then what good is it?
The angels tell me to go forward! And I see this massive geometry of a palace, and so much is happening right now: it’s very difficult to keep up, and I continue to try to do so, and the angels say, “Lo! This and more tomorrow, this and more on the following nineteen days, and lo! You shall be transformed, Son of Man, Son of God, Son of Earth! Look forward to this with Joy, with Humility, and with Exultation!” And I say, “I do, and I do, and I do!” and thus ends the vision.
Sunrise: Call to Aethyr of ZOM. I call King Bnapsen twice.
The angels tell me to focus on the jewel, and to see tall of the colors within it (i.e., those of the rainbow). These colors, they’re saying, represent the astrological forces, but their degree and measure represent, to some degree, the elemental forces. The angels show me all of these colors, and they’re all light up about this gem, and now, rather than seeming like a cut gem, it’s looking more and more like a spherical.
So this sphere of the heart and this sphere of consciousness are becoming one. The angels ask me to note the very center: “This Center is where you will abide, when the rainbow body is realized. You will abide right in that center.” “Praise unto God,” I reply, and ask, “How may I be unshakeable there?”
“You will ‘go for a visit,'” they’re saying, “a ‘small trip,’ and then you will return. It is like any other form of consciousness, but just make every effort to return to the center of this gem, of this spherical, robust rainbow gem, and All, All, All will be open unto you, and you will maintain along this path, and you will also always be a mere heartbeat,” they add, “from the realm of Adam Qadmon.
“Just try your very best to visualize this [aethyr] as a sphere: that’s good.” That’s as far as they can take me: they say that they cannot take me beyond the with LIL. They can’t initiate me yet, although it’s only a few days away before I begin the initiation into the actual realm of Adam Qadmon. They angels say to stay here, and to note within it all of the beauty of all of the rainbow as I see it cast about the center of the sphere, and that as I circulate the surface back into the center, I need to rotate in red, yellow, green, blue, indigo, violet, orange: I need to rotate all of these colors in and to give each of them their due.
They note how this relates to the light-bridge: I will always be equipoised between heaven and earth, they say, and I must always honor both at all times, and I must see both as one thing, one grand unfolding, one grand process. I am grateful to the angels for this. I hesitate to ask the angels if they have anything else: “No,” they cut me off, “there’s nothing more. Stay equipoised here in this heart of the rainbow jewel, and stay there, and enjoy it! Enjoy the fullness of you! Enjoy your humanity, but this time, your humanity in proper proportion: not the humanity in the sense of ‘Oh, all the ways you can screw up,’ but instead the humanity of the fullness of Feeling, of the fullness of Being, of the fullness of Thought, of the fullness of Wonder! And indeed, that Wonder is the key, because human beings can indeed wonder quite well, and thereby know their God quite well.”
I thank the angels again, and ask the angels again whether they, in their generosity and mercy, have anything else. They say “No. Rest in peace. Do everything as unto the servant of the Lord.”
The vision ends.
Noon: Similar procedure. I call on King Bnapsen twice. I try to pour out compassion as much as I can, across spacetime. I try to generate the circulation so fast that this lotus-rose becomes a jewel.
The angels are showing me a rotating circle within another circle, like a gyroscope, and a third one, but now there’s a fourth one being represented by a growing and shrinking circle (like a 3D sphere’s size representing a hypersphere) about the fourth dimension, until there are about seven or eight dimensions represented in all. It’s difficult to describe, but I think they’re trying to describe the appearance of this sphere about this hypersphere within a third dimension, or a 5D sphere within the third dimension, and so on.
The angels use this shifting in and out about 3D space to show these higher dimensions. They show me a little bit of a tube, which is tangent to a firework wheel and is the exit for the sparks, causing it to spin. This, they say, is like what is happening right now with my energy. More and more energy is being kicked up as I my orbit shifts closer to this realm of Adam Qadmon. There’s a little bit of an unease and a wobble, because I’m rotating as I’m revolving about this portal. The angels say to try very hard to retain this spherical consciousness, this sphericity about the heart, and to be very accepting.
The angels note some minor troubles and say that it is not unexpected: “Just do your best.” Now I see this sign of Aries appear, and its horns are sort of curling into a four-chambered heart, or a four-leaf clover. The angels say that this is sort of attitude I can best bring right now: just keep trying, keep at it.
This is like unto the chambers of the heart, I’m told, and a bit of a preview of four elements. “By this, luck can be had, and fortune can rise and fall.”
I try hard to retain this sphericity and to allow the circulation of compassion to continue. I’m seeing something of an elephant’s trunk. “If you can cause that to straighten out,” I’m told, “then it would be like a straight shot into the portal of the realm of Adam Qadmon. Just try to stay balanced, and try to see to it that this happens.”
I ask about the multicolored jewel. The angels are saying to just try my best and to allow it to unfold, in all of my fullness. I see a bit of an alien, and the angels say, “Look, if you seen an alien, just treat it as Divine, and suddenly its divinity will shine forth into your eyes and into your heart.
The angels just note the feeling that is pulling at my heart. “It’s normal, it’s natural, just allow it.” I ask whether they have anything else. They show me a little bit of roots going into the ground, like a seedling. The angels say they’re just going to have that symbol be with me, and to just hold it there. “That’s it.”
I express my thanks to the angels and God; the vision ends.
Sunset: Similar procedure.
I just try very hard to stay at the center of the rainbow jewel and to stay magnetized to the path. The angels encourage this, “Yes, this is good.” They say to not worry about what may have happened today, this was all part of being on the right track and learning to identify when one is not on the right track. The angels say, just in advance, to review: yes, I’m going to go in reverse order: Earth, then Water, then Air, the Fire, when I reach Leaves 19 through 2. (Note: Reviewing the leaves, it appears that Leaf 18 was the one associated with gnomes in both Edward Kelley’s experience and my vision. So, just to be safe, I will place my feet on all four of the watchtower tablets).
Now I feel a pulsating. I try to circulate this pulsating, and it becomes more like a constant vibration, but it’s from this circle, or perhaps from the batter head of a drum, which is vibrating. The angels instruct me to put my astral hand on it (both of my physical hands holding opposite sides of Leaf 22 of Liber Loagaeth), and I do so, and it’s like I’m feeling the energy from it come off of the leaf. Now the angels are going to shake a bunch of stuff off of me, but also shake some things out of me, or cause them to emerge as a result. So they do so, and it’s like plaster is coming off of me, and my astral form is being reduced down to just this rainbow jewel.
That’s what I’m coming down to, and this entire being is being simplified. The plaster isn’t leaving, the angels note: it will have its own orbit about me, but it won’t encase me as it did before. I notice a change to my crown chakra, with a little bit of a lifting, and a little bit of setting it as a magnetizing force, so that it is always, always, always pointing toward the realm of Adam Qadmon.
The angels exhort me to feel this fully, so I do so, feeling all of these emotions that I’m capable of, anger, joy, sadness, envy, but I see these as all rooted in my Understanding of Pain and realize that the substantial basis for all of these emotions is Compassion, and the angels agree: “Yes, Compassion is how it is Measured, and Understanding how it is Measured: that is the task of the mind, ultimately.”
“It’s not so much that any given emotion is wrong,” I note, “it’s that it needs to be measured properly against Compassion.” “That’s exactly right,” they concur.
My whole energy body is feeling very good, and I’m getting a nice high off of this. The angels say not to dwell on any person or interaction, but to try to capture this spirit as best I can throughout my life. I say I will try my best. The angels assuage me: “Just remember, the only thing that will happen is that you will take short trips [from this center].”
I’m getting the sense that the angels wish to close this, and I ask if there’s anything else. “No,” they say: this is as close as they can take me this time, but tomorrow they will start to unfold even more of a hint of LIL (within ARN). Then I will move on to the elemental calls. I thank the angels and the Most High; they bow, and thus ends the vision.
Sunrise: Call to Aethyr of PAZ. Call to King Baligon.
I relax and concentrate on the lotus-rose. The angels note that this is an incremental step as I approach the event horizon of the portal to the world of Adam Qadmon, which appears to me as a black hole.
Continuing to concentrate on the lotus-rose, the angels show it becoming circular, like an ouroboros, spinning around. “This is how the the flower emerged from your heart, is it not?” the angels ask. I agree, in the sense that the stem of flower emerged from the blossom of the preceding flower, repeatedly. The angels say that there will be this circulation within the lotus-rose itself. There will be suffering leading to transcendence, which will lead to suffering and then further transcendence.
Yet the suffering itself, they’re saying, is something that can be relatively avoided in the mundane realm just by continuously giving yourself “oomph” to follow rules and behave appropriately such that suffering can be transcended (such as seen in the symbolism of the white cube). I note difficulty concentrating, but the angels remind me to simply focus on this lotus-rose of my heart, and the distraction will go away.
I see this lotus-rose now being like unto a torus, simplifying now into a jewel about the lotus-rose (note the parallel to the famous Buddhist mantra, Om Mani Padme Hum). The angels say that once you get this, that it’s all sort of “one thing…you’ve been making this distinction between the thorny stem and the blossom. But it is One Thing: it is a Beautiful, sometimes Wonderful, sometimes Heart-Aching sort of thing, and the Heart Aching indicates the Heart, and that It is Alive.” So the Heart Aching as such is–and here I recall the death of my late mother-in-law–the Heart Aching is…and I’m trying to come to terms with something really big here.
“The Heart Aching,” the angels are saying, “is the Condition of the Heart. Though the armor about it is Empty, this pain is normal, this pain is okay. And the condition of Reality leading up to the heart being like This, is okay. And all of this can be concentrated into this Divine Bloom of the flower itself, the Okayness of It All, the Divinity of It All, and the Transcendent Nature that allows it to happen such as This. All of it is okay, all of it can be concentrated.”
So even though it seems as if “the Jewel is in the Heart of the Lotus,” truly, the jewel itself is the lotus, is what the angels are saying, and it’s part of Understanding the depth of Adam Qadmon, which is a journey you shall take and fulfill and complete. That is the Beauty of the Journey. So that’s it: the angels note that I’m a little bit closer in my orbit to the portal; this Realm is a little big closer. All of this is the sphere [spherical consciousness], the angels are just keeping me a little bit off, keeping me at bay. They really want everything to attune, so this is something that I need to reflect on. I thank the angels, and they have nothing further.
Thus ends the vision.
Noon: Similar procedure. I called on King Baligon twice.
I concentrate on the lotus-rose as an Ouroboros, as well as a jewel, as described in the previous Aethyr. I steady myself.
I see two square pyramids, connected by a tube, and all of them appear to be be made out of dough; the tube is already tied into a knot. “Consider the force which ties this knot. This is the force of Ain, and the duality, you’ve seen this already, when you scried your own rainbow body using the call of the Aethyrs.” This knot, they say, can be considered like unto sphericity (of LIL), or the double-sphere arising out of the torus.
“Yet, there’s something nice and squishy about this, isn’t there? So that only if you were rather skilled could you even see that this was caused by a single force which created the illusion of duality, then united it, and then unfolded it throughout separate sephiroth.” So I’m wondering about the nature of these two pyramid-like, or tetrahedron-like (and here they tell me that they are tetrahedra). Here we have, once again, an ogdoad (two tetrahedra times four faces per tetrahedron), becoming an ennead (via the connecting tube), which perhaps could be considered a decad (due to the new shape created by the knot). So you have this reflection of the ten sephiroth, even in the world of Adam Qadmon.
I’m curious as to what this means. If everything is squishy, there’s an infinity with this. I try hard to understand this deeply. I let my heart work on this problem. The angels say, “Note that what you’re seeing as an ouroboros: this is the same kind of thing. It’s a symbol of continuity, much like a Möbius strip, or a Klein bottle (which may be a better explanation). It’s this twisting about itself. The reason you’re seeing it as seemingly separate forces is because you’ve already seen it as such (when I scried my rainbow body previously, I saw two jewels which mirrored each other), but also,” and here they bid me pause for a moment, “Think about this. This is three dimensions about three dimensions, coming upon itself. This is like unto the present state/earth on the left, the goal state/heaven on the right, and the transformation in the middle, so time is locked in as well. But it’s all one thing.
“It’s all one thing, and it’s a multiplicity of things.” And I feel like I’m very close to grokking this and they chuckle, “not just yet, but this is very important. This is a very potent symbol for you, because you’re very excited by this, and you want to know what it is, and that’s okay. That’s good.”
I take a look at the symbol, and I see it extending down, and now it seems like a bunch of pencils tied together with a rubber band in the middle, the other end of which is dangling from the ceiling. This point at which the rubber band meets the ceiling is the portal into the world of Adam Qadmon. “If you just take this heart of compassion and aim it directly at this symbol, you’ll see that this is the same thing. On the one hand if you twist it together, it’s the jewel, on the other hand if you were to take it apart, you could see one end being like unto the thorny end of the lotus-rose, and the other end like unto the bloom thereof. It’s all the same thing: all is one, all is one, all is one.”
The angels leave me with all of this to contemplate. I ask whether there’s anything else, and the angels bid me pause and to consider this dough-symbol floating in water–not dissolving, just floating.
The vision ends.
Sunset: Similar procedure.
I’m feeling fairly high right now. The angels tell me to relax and to speed up the entire process going from the previous symbolism to the lotus-rose to the jewel. I feel the gem now in its fullness; at first it seems to have an amber or reddish-orange tinge, but now I see green flashing in it, and the angels suggest that I add indigo and blues, and I see now: the jewel is a rainbow jewel. The angels remind me that the lights can come from the realm of Adam Qadmon in their fullness, but that they can be seen in Chokmah, and indeed, this is the final Aethyr of this sephirah. At its most developed they shine through to me now, they say. One need not have completely entered the realm of Adam Qadmon to see them this way, but having an opening into it is important in order to shine in your fullness (suggestive of a complete opening into Chokmah and a necessary step to develop the rainbow body).
Now I’m feeling a lot of energy coming off of the leaf, and it’s trying to tell me something, so I listen. I feel my crown chakra being pulled upward, an uncharacteristically strong energetic feeling for this Aethyr. It’s like this is the initiation, the re-initiation into Kether (the angels remind me that a prior sigil of mine with the intent of “I reinitiate into Kether” was, in fact, still active). The angels say, “Be prepared, be ready, Son of Man, Son of God, Son of Earth! This be the final vision of Chokmah unto you. Know this: that the different elements and the different spacings [of (space-time) points], that one may find as one abideth in the realm of Adam Qadmon: these can always shift and change! It is important to be fully immersed in the Understanding in order to be fully immersed in the Wisdom.
“Behold, this vision (from noon, of the dough shape), which you have seen in its tetrahedral format: this steeping of it in the water can be considered like unto the fullness of Ain and Ain Soph. For within the Ain is the Ain Soph, and that fullness containeth within it the Infinite Light, which you see before you, twisted into this shape, twisted into this Present-Future state, which is always, always, always bound both by time, but, indeed, by the supernals as a whole. And so, know this, Son of Man, Son of God, Son of Earth: the richness of this symbol will continue to unfold itself to you. For now, it seemeth like dough: tomorrow it shall not seem quite so. It shall take on a greater significance and a new symbolic meaning. Rest now easy, Son of Man, Son of God, Son of Earth! No more can be said unto you directly, but all of these things shall be open unto you in the very few weeks left remaining.
“Much love upon thee: go now in peace. Serve the Lord.”
Sunrise: Call to Aethyr of ZID. Call to King Blumaza; Governors Zamfres, Todnaon, and Pristac; and Zodiacal Kings Gebabal, Olpaged, and Zarzilg.
I have compassion towards all I see. Now I see a white door; the door bends back into a spherical form, as a reminder of what needs to be done in terms of compassion towards suffering. I see the psychedelically colored sphere of fixed stars, and now I see it turn into an eyeball (which I’ve seen many times in these post-ZIP Aethyrs), which is reminiscent or often one of hundreds upon the Whale of God.
God is saying directly to me now: “This will become an increasingly purified vision of the spheres of Binah, Chokmah, and of Kether, and ultimately of the spheres of Adam Qadmon. Listen very closely now, my Son.” And I see a 3D stellation, a preview of the future Aethyrs (or a review of them, as I’ve been through the Aethyrs before). It’s like God is showing me this, and (my speech becomes rapid now) I’m within this eye, this psychedelic eye. And this stellated sphere is like unto the force of Chokmah, and it’s causing all of these different colors to appear (within the eye), and yet it is also reflecting them, but as one gets closer and closer in their approach to Kether, to LIL, then the stellation becomes even more so and more spherical, and ultimately rounded and more and more like unto the perfection of Kether itself. And these Two become One: yea, the Mind and Heart of God become as one.
The energy of this sphere is much higher than I recall it being, requiring much more concentration! I am compressing in all subsequent Aethyrs (except LIL) here. I see a cylinder rotating across the edge of a disc at an angle, scraping as it goes. These are the two forces again, Binah and Chokmah, and yet their interaction in this way is a reflection of Kether itself, which itself is all it can be on account of the world of Adam Qadmon. I see the motion of Chokmah; it becomes like unto a torus (note that a cylinder can be curved into a torus). It rotates into itself, becoming spherical. The disc itself also becomes a torus, and both of them rotate about themselves in this manner, becoming a double-joined sphere unto itself.
I’m having compassion for my ignorance and confusion, and I allow the fullness of this rainbow body to appear. The Divine seizes upon this and says, “All of this motion is the rainbow body. All of this vision is the rainbow body. Everything like unto what you have ever seen is like unto the rainbow body. This force, something that must become accepted within all of you, throughout, throughout your entire being: know this, that, yea, even the struggles that you’re feeling right now continue to be a mark of PRONOA of the Divine upon you. And so, continue your best, continue this effort, continue to work through everything so that you may know this PRONOA in its fullness. For, yea, one who knows this PRONOA in its absolute fullness need do nothing else, for one liveth continuously in the Love of the Divine.”
I ask the angels whether they have anything else. They say, “No, the Divine Himself has spoken to you! We dare not say anything in addition to this.”
With that, the vision ends.
Noon: Similar procedure. I began recording before having called on the zodiacal kings and governors, but that has been addressed.
I crank up the compassion as much as I can for everything about me, including the grand principles from the previous vision. Once again I see this stellated star, and I ask the angels, “Please, what have you all to show me?” and the star seems to come toward me, and then float away, but then towards me again, and away again.
I see this stellation revolving about what appears to be a black hole. The message is that this is the portal into the realm of Adam Qadmon, and that there is unbounded light within. “Think of a black hole, how there is infinite [i.e., measureless/maoffas] light within it: for indeed, none can escape.” I find this very interesting, and it really touches my heart in this interesting way. This is a resolution between the force of Ain (and indeed, black holes have much force to them!), and yet, at the same time, there is infinite light within it (for all intents and purposes). If one were to enter a black hole, one would experience “infinity,” so to speak.
I think about what it would be like to enter this, and I see myself stretching out like spaghetti. However, there is some part of my heart that really wants to be guided by this experience of entering the black hole. This is “beyond the beyond” in this way. I decide to try to generate compassion. “How can one circulate the infinite?” is the question that comes to me. “How can one circulate the infinite,” the question repeats.
“How can one circulate the infinite?”
I have no words for this. “Indeed there are no words, Son of Man, Son of God, Son of Earth.” “How can one circulate the infinite,” I repeat the question. “The Infinite already is, and therefore, it need not be circulated. Indeed, one only needs to be magnetized to it.” This seems simpler to my mind and to my heart, and I simply allow such magnetism to be.
And that seems to be the answer. Instead of doing, one simply allows itself to be as it is. There’s this long, infinite line which emerges from this reflection, and it tends to want to wrap itself into a circle, but indeed, it is infinite! And it is only bound within this circular frame, but if one were to enter it [as it is], then one would become like this line of spaghetti that Stephen Hawking talked about.
This is very wonderful! This is the portal into the realm of Adam Qadmon; it’s showing up and looming larger with each advance along this path. I express my gratitude. It’s as if everything is indescribable.
“And that is enough,” the angels say. Here ends the vision.
Sunset: Similar procedure.
The pace is picking up, and this is a highly metaphorical vision. Between the last session and this, I note that the colors of a rainbow as a whole must exist as measureless light which is unseen due to the gravity of a black hole, and of course this should have a parallel in the infinite light in the world of Adam Qadmon. The angels encourage me, saying, “Yes! Now consider how this dynamic of light, of stellation (of later Aethyrs), and ultimately of sphericity (of LIL) should continue like this, within this black hole.” Specifically: “Consider the clouds”–of flashing colors of LIL, within which hovered a silver sphere–“and how these represent this amorphous, difficult-to-grasp, intangible, this ‘how-can-I-even-get-here’ light from a black hole! Because one can’t actually go in there,”–here the angels return Adam Qadmon–“because it’s infinite, and one would lose oneself [as merging with a cloud]: one would dissipate.
“Yet one wouldn’t actually dissipate! This is the Infinite Source: this is the source of All Things. This is the reflection which the sphericity must bind itself in, in order to Know Itself most deeply!”
I’m trying to remain magnetized to the line to the portal to Adam Qadmon, and compassionate. The angels remind, “This lotus-rose symbol will be a servant to you.” I ask the angels in particular how might this wonderful world of Adam Qadmon also be compressed into this symbol, and recall aloud how the angels are represented by the bee upon the portal to the world of Adam Qadmon, which is within the blossom of the flower.
The angels say, “Is not the very magic the finding of the space which allows All Things To Happen?” The angels refer to the stamen and pistil of a flower, which allows for reproduction to occur, and all of this happens due to a good amount of space and its correct configuration, for this perfect unfolding to occur. If one were to compress the Vast Infinitude of the world of Adam Qadmon within this symbol: it is of the nature of the flower to reproduce itself, and to be constructed such that all of that can happen. Here the angels dwell on King Bynepor of the Heptarchy who, being associated with the expansive and reproductive powers of Jupiter, is also hailed as first among the equals of the Heptarchical kings.
Here I see a line moving through this space of the flower, but it seems to curve. The infinitude of the world of Adam Qadmon strikes my consciousness–and here I once again try to remain in accord with the straight line toward the world of AQ, and the angels exhort me: “Just stay magnetized to the straight line, don’t try to force it! If you are magnetized toward it, then the entire path that you follow in life is essentially curved. It is only curving about the many spheres of individual consciousnesses that you travel through.
“You are traveling about the spheres that other individual beings find themselves in. They may consider those spheres to actually be Black Iron Prisons, or they may consider them to be like unto the rules of correct living [e.g., a white cube] in order to be a good person, or just trying their best to do the right thing, trying to ‘paint the outside white.’
“Yet the point of all of this is that the straight line whereby all of us actually walk–if you were to place this about the Great Sphere of All Consciousness, then we are all actually merely following a straight line [i.e., the shortest distance between two points on a sphere]. If we just magnetized ourselves to the overall straight line [of the world of Adam Qadmon], suddenly, every single thing that happens in our life is to be detached from, or to be experienced but not suffered, or to be suffered but to be suffered gladly, because there is no resistance to the path that one is already on.” By this, in so doing, in fully surrendering to this line, I’m being shown rainbows from earlier today, and I’m being shown that in fully surrendering to this line, the natural self is always being bowed to, and so one truly is an Ipsissimus.
The angels say that this is enough; there’s more that could be delved into, but this is for the higher Aethyrs. The angels note just how much I’m compressing across vast chunks of Aethyrs right now; the angels are gaining speed, as it were, and all of this consciousness is dilating and expanding at the same time, “so everything that you need to wrestle with as a human being is presented to you and there are patterns and your mind is able to do skip-logic out to a later lesson, and it must be dealt with as it thus naturally arises.”
Sunrise: Call to Aethyr of ZIM. Call to King BNASPOL, ZIM governors Gecaond, Laparin, & Docepax, and zodiacal kings Lavavoth, Olpaged, and Alpudus.
I note that I continue my approach toward the Abyssal point; I ignore such parts of the vision, except to project compassion towards them. I place myself in the astral throne, with understanding that to project compassion and lovingkindness towards some, there must be understanding.
The angels align my chakras as into a unit of seven concentric spheres. This moves along the gold-shimmering path towards the Center of the Heart of the Divine; it occurs to me to have my heart express compassion towards every part of this vision, and this seems to quickly move me quite a way down this path. The angels say that this is very good; the idea here is that I am interacting with the rules of my own journey in a direct way, which is to say this expression or heart-projection of compassion towards them and towards the path.
I maintain this evenness. I note that I understand why the angels have instructed me to remain in this throne; it’s very easy to get lost and ungrounded in this kind of work. But if you maintain this poise, it’s very key to this process. One of the governors, Gecaond, is showing me a rock, and says to me, “Grok the rock.” I mention that it’s likely made up of a mix of elements and molecules; I hesitate and say that I’m not an expert. He says, “Yes, but what is the rock?” I mention that it has several uses, and it has a long history from the beginning of time. I begin speaking about it in the rules and context in which I find it, and he says, “That’s the key. None of that other stuff really matters, unless you see how it came to be here, what purpose it’s having by its very presence. Remember this,” he says, as I continue my scrying and spiritual path. Take things as they are and in their current context, and what the context may have meant across various moments. He removes the scene with the rock.
Now the angels want to twist me inside out and to refold my energy body. So they pull at my heart chakra and eventually fold me into a pyramid, with the tip replaced by a sphere, which is the heart chakra itself, floating just above it. The angels say that that this is what it will be like (presumably the rainbow body). The angels also mention the cube of the bottom of the throne on which I sit, and to consider what happens if one combines the dual polyhedra of the cube and octohedron. Suppose someone believed held that material reality in the form of the cube was against oneself, as in the Black Iron Prison, then combining it with its natural counterpart, the octahedron, may allow someone to rise out of the trap of this sort of thinking by offering additional points of perspective.
I express my gratitude. The vision ends.
Noon: Similar procedure.
The angels note that I am in the throne astrally and that I continue to generate compassion towards anything which comes across my attention, including my attention of my throned astral body on itself. This causes it to return to itself. Note: this is a very high level of simultaneous attention. Having had a meditation practice and a good working memory is very helpful to me at this stage.
I’m seeing a cube, but it’s difficult; I wonder for a moment whether this is dispersion of the Abyss. Concentrating upon it, I realize that, no, such is not the case. It’s not a cube per se, but rather the bottom and back parts of a cube (see diagram below for an approximation).
It’s like the angels are trying to close these three sides into a single 3D figure, but they cannot (note that four sides is the minimum number of sides for a 3D solid). I am confused, and generate compassion towards this confusion. I am about to move on but the vision changes, and I see this as a Hexagon now. The hexagon contains within itself the shape of the cube, they advise (in the sense of a 2D projection). This has to do with Metatron’s cube, they say.
When I concentrate on this figure, it’s as though it should come straight to the center, but it does not. The angels comment that trying to get to the exact center does not work and that one needs to approximate the center of this hexagon by fractals by (note: typing this up and giving it thought, the assumption here is a slight misalignment with the center and an irregular hexagon–drawing a diagonal across the cube in all three dimensions would not work in such a case; with Metatron’s cube, there would be no need for what follows). The angels then show a series of successive approximations towards such a center with smaller and smaller hexagons which are centered about the previous hexagon’s center in the first step, and then the upper or lower tip of that smaller hexagon in the next step. All in all, the point is that one could use this if one knew the circumference of the circumscribed circle of such. Saturn (the seventh planet), I’m told, represents the principle of going from a larger hexagon toward a smaller in order to reach the center. The angels add that this principle could be expanded out into a larger view as well, towards a large circumference, and they note the septenary nature of such a process.
My heart opens a bit now. There’s a bit of a distraction again, but I simply concentrate past it again, with compassion and lovingkindness. I’m forced to put in some additional effort, but I note that we’re approaching ZAX on Saturday, so tomorrow, Friday, and Saturday are the three remaining days before we arrive at ZIP and thereby cross the Abyss. Now I take matters a step further and collectively place all of the distractions together in front of me as a group, which I regard as “contextualized” or “understood” suffering (i.e., dukkha), and focus on them with compassion. This seems to help.
Now I ask the angelic governors and kings for assistance; the angels note that four kings are called on any given day, and they give me homework to match up the zodiacal kings who are called on any given day, and to match that up with the Heptarchical king of any given day of the week. This is clearly an indication of the strength of the individual planets as suggested by their respective strengths: King Baligon is explicitly associated with Venus and the Air (“whatsoever can be wrought in aerial actions”; one of the signs which Venus rules is Libra, an air sign, a projective (I prefer this term to the older term of “masculine”) of the diurnal sect). King Babalel is associated with Mars and Water (“Mighty and Wonderful in Waters, Whose power is in the bowels of the Waters”; Scorpio, a water sign, is ruled by Mars; this sign is of the nocturnal sect and is receptive (a term I prefer to “feminine”). King Bnaspol is associated with Mercury and Earth (“To whom the Earth with her bowels, and secrets what so ever are delivered”; Mercury both rules and is exalted in Virgo, which is a receptive sign and of the nocturnal sect).
The only missing element here is fire; both the sun (Leo) and Jupiter (Sagittarius) rule fire signs, which by definition are projective. Still, Leo is more fiery (with its only sign of domicile being a fire sign, and its sign of exaltation also being this), it is difficult. Still, this isn’t unambiguous. While the Bobogel gives “Wisdom and Science, True Philosophy, and True Understanding of all Learning, grounded upon Wisdom,” etc., this strikes me as so close to the Divine (and the sun being the “king” of the planets), that reducing it to an element of fire may be a mistake. I suspect that doing this research that the angels have assigned (which, they advise, may be best delayed until after gebofal), will make clear which planetary/sephirothic king would be the one whose power most relates to the classical element of fire.
I see six rays emerging from a central point, as well as a dotted line of a seventh. I generate compassion towards this ray, and it becomes an unbroken ray. When I concentrate on this, it’s as though a folding fan emerges and in a circular manner unfolds into the psychedelic space from a previous vision. The angels mention that this image of a fan is important; the angels say that I specifically request the crowned rainbow body. The angels say that this is “wise, insofar as you know what you’re asking for.” They then note that the level of compassion required for this may be too much to constantly have, so it’s okay to “zip up” this awareness and instead move according to my usual mundane manners. In other words, there’s not this burden to constantly be aware all of the time, like unto The Fool in the Tarot (which I had a vision of, not when I was scrying, I think, but last night during hypnagogia).
Now I’m told by the angels how to discuss my experience with the Aethyrs with a friend–I plan to do so!
Finally, the angels note that there’s this progress that can always be made by returning to the folding fan: “For what is a fan if not something to be seen, admired for the beauty upon it and as it is displayed in performance art, for the relief one feels when it gives relieving air to the skin?”
I get a bit of energy off the leaf 32a. The angels seem to be holding me in a vibratory sense: their subtle body surgery is now a lot more, well, subtle.
The vision ends.
Sunset: Similar procedure. I take three 7-7-14 breaths to steady my mind.
The angels show me a cylinder as a nice conceptual combination of aspects of a sphere and a cube. I am curious for a moment about combining a sphere and an octahedron. It’s a bit like methane (note: this has been observed to not be perfectly tetrahedral). I pour my heart into the vision into the lack of clarity, turn the ring around so that it touches the leaf, and vibrate the governors’ names.
The angels say that the zodiacal king assignment which I completed was good, and I ask whether there was anything I missed, or whether there was one of the Enochian Heptarchical kings who is indeed associated with fire. Fire, they say, is like when you’re leveling up, so King Bynepor is the one I should probably be looking at. King Bnapsen (suggested by Saturn, often seen with a scythe to suggest reaping) completes the old cycle and allows for the new one to happen, but King Bynepor is regeneration and renewal, and they remind me of the alchemical backronym “Igne Natura Renovatur Integra” (“by fire, nature renews itself”). It also makes sense that water would be the other attribution of Jupiter, because water is also needed to begin the regeneration process.
Returning to the cylinder, the angels note that the ring is itself a symbol of the circle and square (and has upon it a symbol of a straight line and circle). They note that the finger upon the hand that wears the ring is generally cylindrical, and the arms of the hand, and indeed the body typically has all four cylindrical limbs and a cylindrical head-and-neck upon a roughly cylindrical torso: fractal cylinders. I pour myself into this idea: going from the door (with its lines and right angles) into the expanse of outer space (generally a 360 degree experience) also combines these ideas, as does the fan.
The angels bring this idea back to the symbol. “Now it’s time to think about how to do this with the symbol in its current formation and how to put it all together. Instead of a pyramid with this symbol at top, instead consider a way to put this spiral in three dimensions (as a hyperbola rotated about an axis), encased within this pyramid. After the spiral reaches the base of the pyramid here on Earth, it begins a rotation about the earth, creating a falling teardrop effect (note: this is roughly a metaphorical inversion of the drippings of the Abyss, and during the vision I note the difficulty in maintaining concentration to see this).
I see a moderately sized wasp’s nest now, which is reminds me of the shape of a pine cone. Several wasp-like insects fly to it, and there seems to honey exuding from it. There’s honey emerging from it, and the honey seems like a teardrop upon a teardrop, and it is so sweet to humanity, it’s like exactly what humanity needs right now. I see this, and (amidst several distractions–which hold back by increasing my compassion) there’s a beautiful big light (Ain Sof Aur), seeming to originate from where the nest/cone is attached. The light encompasses me, and I seem to elevate. This whole process seems to crack me open so as to show me the benefits of these higher pre-Abyssal Aethyrs. As you approach the Abyss, there’s still much to be had, it just requires a lot of concentration.
I see letters; they arrange to form “Bobogel,” … “Bobogel Omnia Tucare Est.” I don’t know what that means, but now looking up the (questionable?) Latin on Google Translate: “Bobogel omnia tu care est”: “Bobogel, all is dear to you.” (If you know Latin and know a better translation, please reach out). I see letters again. This time they are in English: “A…All shall be revealed to you in time. Go in peace and serve the Lord.” Behind this, and lit up in bright light, is a future version of myself, very much at peace and compassionate towards where I am right now. Apparently, this is where I needed it!
I’m very happy about all of this. I make plans to complete the symbol. The angels close the vision.
Sunrise: Call to Aethyr of UTA/VTA (“you-tay”). Call to King BABALEL. Vibrated both the governors of this Aethyr as well as the Zodiacal kings associated with it. I got a side effect from a shot and wasn’t feeling great (nearly vomited), so I repeated the call to UTA just to be safe.
The angels instruct me to put both hands up on the leaf 33b, because they can tell that I don’t have much strength to leave my hand on the Holy Table. Nonetheless, they ask that the sides of my feet remain abutted to the plastic furniture risers (which I am using in lieu of those made of sweet wood), which contain the four miniature Sigilla Dei Aemeth.
I see a whirling disc, full of color. This, they say, is the preview of the rainbow body, and the preview of Chokmah, and of Kether by way of Chokmah. I generate compassion at their request. The angels are directing me to a throne. They note that although my physical body is not well, my astral body is ready for this vision. I put my hand on the Holy Table at their direction.
The angels mention that Babalon appeared to me briefly when I was sick, and that God in His Mercy (J/Iehusoz) prevented my vomiting (praise be unto him). King BABALEL praises my calling upon the zodiacal kings. This will be sort of an upgrade for me: as a result, so much more will occur (though so much had to occur for this result!).
I continue to sit upon this throne. I’m a bit paralyzed, but everything I see come before me, I have a lot of compassion for. I see a whirlwind of angels, rotating: at this point, it’s unclear whether it is they or I who is speaking. The message is: “It’s enough. No matter what: it’s enough. The rainbow body is enough for this.” All of the horror, all of the beauty: everything is enough in this moment. The angels instruct me to sit upright in my throne. They note the cube created by the four legs and the seat, but also, the arising from that, the head and heart, and the larger spheres implied by them: this is the rainbow body crown.
The angels (governors and kings) say that they will do “surgery” on my subtle body now. I vibrate their names and express my gratitude. They express their gratitude for me doing this, even though it was very difficult. I ask if there’s anything else, and they say no. “Rejoice, Son of Man, Son of God, Son of Earth. Such was the worst of these [Aethyrs].” The angels instruct me to remain in the throne astrally, and show me a couple of discs before closing the vision.
Noon: Similar procedure: this calling of the Zodiacal Kings will continue through the rest of the Aethyrs.
I’ve recovered somewhat, and focus on the heart of compassion. I remind myself that chunks of this world needs to be grokked before one can have compassion towards them. Once again I’m seeing the 7D sphere, with line segments (but, emotionally, “rays”) emerging from the origin, indicating directions and seven colors. I ask the angels what I ought to focus on in order to balance across these dimensions. The angels instruct me to continue with my compassion, but also try to start incorporating others’ perspectives. I acknowledge that this is not my strong suit, but the angels say to keep trying, even in small ways: it’ll make a huge difference.
I see all seven of the angels, plus my HGA, almost bouncing up and down on my chest, trying to jumpstart this subtle body/psychic surgery and work. I see two of the angels, Ooanamb and Gebabal: they lead me to a door in outer space, which is similar to the door in a previous vision, except rather than being in “regular” outer space(!), it’s a trippy, psychedelic, Jackson-Pollock-on-drugs kind of space, very vivid colors. The angels instruct me to go through the door, and I do; like with Orpheus, I can’t help but look back. I see the door dissolve into this psychedelic space and become one with it.
Now I feel as though I’m falling, but the angels correct me: I’m not falling. The mind is what is falling: this is the force of the drippings being pulled by the Abyss. The general gravity is trying to pull me down out of the Heart of God. One must be patient and persistent, and eventually a being’s heart will magnetize toward the Heart of God, rather than fall away from it. “You need to not identify with the drippings.”
Considering that the door is what has dissolved, and that there’s this downward motion I’m feeling, I remind myself that in space–other than gravity, collision, or magnetism–the body tends to either remain in the same motion, or at rest. So I ask all of the angels collectively how to approach this Divine Center, and again the angels say to be willing to let go of my ideas of reputation. Be willing to let go of a bunch of things so to allow being authentically in Divine Union, and the blessings coming to “will be beyond what imagination could have predicted.”
The angels are trying so hard to help me recover physically, and I’m very grateful for this. There’s a tiny circle directly ahead, and it’s a planet, like unto the Pure Land, they say. The angels tell me to keep in mind that there is a slight flaw in some of the doctrines surrounding the Pure Land, which is to say that this world is corrupted. The angels tell me not to worry so much about that.
Instead, coming to this Pure Land, the angels inform me that this is the proper perception that all is already perfect. I become distracted by visions of me not too far off in the future, two to six months. I return to the vision, and try to relax into it. I sit for a bit in the perfection of this pure land, recognizing the perfection of all things. My heart realigns a bit. The angels encourage me: “Yes, this is what we’ve been waiting for you to do.” The angels close the vision with instructions to rest, and I express my gratitude.
The vision ends.
Sunset: Similar procedure.
I see the same psychedelic scene again. The angels reiterate that I need to be consistent about remaining in compassion. The angels point to the psychedelic scene again. All of this needs to be loved, I’m told. This is a big task, and this needs to be constant, but I will be able to do this, even if not 100%. That’s what the rainbow body is. Making the effort and doing the work and trying is all very important, they advise. I say that I will take it to heart, and the angels ask me to take it in heart, so I do.
The angels recommend just trying to sleep tonight, and that tomorrow should look a lot better. They ask me to continue compassion and lovingkindness towards all, even towards things: “You’re in the same world together, and a chair has the level of consciousness to be such and not something else, doesn’t it?”
My holy guardian angel pulls me aside to speak. He says that this may be the last time he and I speak. Should I be successful in crossing the Abyss and realizing the rainbow body, he will become fused with me. He wants to express his love towards me, and he thanks me for reaching out to contact him, and I’m so very touched I start to weep a little. I return my love to him and I say that though I am a human and below him in the hierarchy, I consider him to be a brother. “No,” he says, “we are the same. We are brothers.” He enfolds himself about me for when the fusion occurs.
I ask the governors and kings, whether they have anything else to show me: “Please do not hold back, if it’s in your heart to give.” They say no, to continue to this lesson: remember to love all, even thoughts.
The zodiacal kings whom I have called roll up the remaining zodiacal kings who were passed over in previous scrying session. “No worries,” they say, “you were going according to the formula you knew. Now it’s good that you’re using this formula.”
Sunrise: Call to Aethyr of NIA. I call BNAPSEN via the prayer as listed in Stenwick’s Mastering the Mystical Heptarchy, but not using the Enochian calls.
The angels show me seven points, and of course today, being the last day of the first week, their meaning is described: the points are placed along the outermost ring of a spiral. The remaining 42 days work their way through to the center of the spiral. On Day 49, the last portion of that spiral can be connected via three points of a line segment (for you can further subdivide the spiral to account for the same call three times on each of the days of the ritual, which is to say 147 points in all). This line segment connecting the final stretch of the spiral can be thought to start at the reading of Leaf 1b, ending at the reading of Leaf 1a, and the finally, on the evening of the final day, reading of the leaf in its entirety, at which point the center is made manifest. Note: this reduces the role of error which one would surely have by attempting to find the center by starting at the outside of such a spiral.
King BNAPSEN mentions that blogging about this is how a particular method of gebofal can be handed down, thus fulfilling his Binah/Saturn role. A cooperative effort to publish copies of Amzes Naghezes Hardeh with this method is suggested to me.
I point the wand at Leaf 43b; King BNAPSEN and Governors Orcanir, Chialps, and Soageel are unfolding the structure of what is going on as I scry during the gebofal ritual, which is helpful and appeals to my luminary-trined Saturn. I’m given more information and meaning now that I’ve hit Day 7, the end of the first seven days. I ask explicitly about the symbol; now that I’ve been reconciled with all of the planets, the symbol can now come forth. They show a spiral beginning at the outside of the four-pointed star, and to have the point at which the square (which is suggested by the diamond) would be circled (i.e., a circle overlapping the square have the same area), have that be at the 3.5 mark of a seven-“circle” spiral; to help visualize it, I’ve shown it below:
I see rays coming down about me, and they relate to the rainbow body. They say that my mind and heart is relating better to the subtle body and therefore the rainbow body can be emerge and be more realized over time.
Noon: Similar procedure.
I comment on noticing the Leaf 43a is the first of these early leaves with its own corner and row that doesn’t have every other letter missing. I’ve filled in a few of these based on my intuition (but don’t claim them to be the be-all, end-all). I call on the angelic king BNAPSEN & governors Orcanir, Chialps, and Soageel, and they mention that there’s a parallel to ZAX and the Abyss, as well as to Ain (of the world of Adam Qadmon), which is the reverse of the spelling of this Aethyr. This, they mention, is the preview of Leaf 1 on day 49. There’s more depth to these Aethyrs than one would otherwise give credit for, so what I’m doing now is following the septenary spiral inward to its logical conclusion.
The angels instruct me to place the face of the PELE ring on the front of Leaf 43, which the book is opened to. To do so, I put the PELE ring on a finger on my left hand so that it can continue to touch the book. However, I naturally place the back of the hand upon the leaf rather than turning the ring around so that my palm remains on it. They joke about the trope of sci-fi shows to somehow “reverse the polarities” to get the reverse effect of a problem they’re trying to solve via the normal polarization. Still, there’s something to be said about this (and typing this up, I’m thinking the message that things can’t be “unchanged,” but rather changed again in an attempt to honor the previous arrangement). They are “reversing the polarities” (i.e., King BNAPSEN is reversing some of what King BYNEPOR Thursday–note that astrologically, Saturn is the great malefic while Jupiter is the great Benefic; Saturn is only half of Jupiter’s mass and so can’t undo all of it). The angels tell me to get used to this push-pull, and that this will happen several times, and why these two planets are spaced a day apart on the days of the week. I’m told that this is the nature of what happens when one is placed at the center, and why the meaning of visions can seem to reverse or change meaning. A little vibration or wave can be completely disorienting, and things can suddenly seem upside down or reversed with only a little movement.
I can see a 3D funnel-like spiral come up from the palm of my hand. They begin by showing me a 2D version of the spiral (such as that above). Then they have me look at the funnel as instead a spherical version, which reminds me of a a tennis ball which a dog has chewed, causing it to come undone at the seams, which can be looped around itself. If the inner part of the seam were smaller, then it can be looped around itself in a spiral-like manner. Then the angels tell me to contemplate this in 4D space; they hint that the geometry I will see may be too much to interpret directly.
King BNAPSEN mention that the allergy drugs I’m on have helped to make the restructuring of my subtle body easier. I see a lot of waves; this is like when an ultrasound loosens up knots in a physical body. “Behold his wonders.”
The vision ends.
Inter-scrying commentary: So, believe it or not, I’ve not read the entirety of Dee’s Monas Hieroglyphica until just now, though I’ve seen the commentary offered by Dr. Justin Sledge and Jason Louv. I also already knew that symbol by heart. A few points of contrast between his symbol and mine:
First, the spiral: his spiral naturally closes, mine remains open.
Second, is the symbol of the Tao is central, while the cross is separated from the symbol of the elements (as indicated by the divided diamond). The cross carries with it the meaning of the unfolded cube, which is the unfolding of the heart.
Third, the elements are placed along the outside rather than central to the symbol. This is important to need to balance oneself among the four elements.
Sunset: Similar procedure.
Once again, I’m shown the seven dots. The angels show me a more basic binary version of his Theorem:
The angels are saying that this is a more basic and binary form of the Monas Hieroglyphica: 20, 21, and 22, in which can be seen the force and power of Ain, as well as the natural progression leading to a 2 and a 3 (20 + 21 = 1 + 2 = 3). They show me this binary and ask me rhetorically to merge this concept with getting to a total of seven (by adding all the dots); the angels note that one gets from 7 to 15 to 31 to 63, each of which is its own form of sacredness (7 being the number of the classical astrological planets, fifteen being the sum of any Saturn square, 31 being the name of El in Gematria, and 63 being 7*9, with 9 having its special importance to Enochian as I’ve gone over in previous posts). 127 is prime and (credit to Wikipedia; float them some money, will you?) is the smallest prime that can be written as the sum of multiple consecutive odd-numbered primes: 127 is the smallest prime that can be written as the sum of the first two or more odd primes: 127 = 3 + 5 + 7 + 11 + 13 + 17 + 19 + 23 + 29, and is the sum of the sums of the divisors of the first 12 positive integers (78 is the sum of those numbers, so 11 (for the 1’s for the first 12 numbers, except 1 itself, which is already included for the number 1) then add 2, 2, 3, 2, 4, 3, 2, 5, 2, 3, 4, 6). The angels kind of want me to stop here. The angels want me to stop here as we’ve reached 27 – 1.
Taking this splitting to its normal extension, they say consider when 7 & 15 meet up opposite each other: 4 four match each other, the other four of the final row of 8 do not. If 7 and 31 meet, 4 would match each other, 12 would not. If 7 and 63 met, then 4 would meet and 28 would not. They say it has something to do with what is left over, and something about exponents. However, I’m not following a lot of the logic. I call on King BNAPSEN and Governors Orcanir, Chialps, and Soageel again. They have me pause to center and say they’re going to show me. 128 + 7 sums to 135, which is 9*15; I’m still confused because they’re switching what gets added up. They say “hold on,” and they comment that this is 27 + 7. Then they have me add 7 + 28 = 263, which is Resh, the solar letter, plus 63, which is the number already have from 26 – 1. They mention 519 but then they stop. They say to add one less than the power of 2 to a different power of 2 which is larger. They say that 519 will be telling to me. They call this my homework.
The angels have me wait. King BNAPSEN shows me the letter V which can be oriented as a 7 in Arabic numerals but in Roman numerals is 5, so together this is 12. He shows me the sun being exalted astrologically being a symbol of an exalted heart. The angels tell me to set my wand on the Holy Table and to put both hands together in prayer on both sides of the leaf, which creates an interesting energy.
I do a quick prayer asking for mercy. The angels show me a lotus flower, and show me a moon within it (note that this combination is also symbolic of the Buddhist bodhisattva deity Tara). The angels ask me to change the foot on which the BNAPSEN seal is located, so I do, crossing my legs to do so, such that my posture is reminiscent of the posture of certain martyrs and, I note, to The Hanged Man in the Tarot. I concentrate on these two images together, The Hanged Man and the lotus flower with the moon inside of it. He’s now inverted, so upright and his hair floats upward. The angels tell me to accustom myself to inversion.
The Hanged Man rising up up out of the lotus reminds me of the mantra, Om Mani Padme Hum, the lotus-jewel. The Hanged Man being number XII of the major arcana adds significance, and of course this is actually the 13th trump (since the numbering of the major arcana starts with 0, The Fool). This gives significance to the Watchtowers, which are 12×13 in dimension, thus coming to 156 letters per watchtower. I’m looking into the heart of this inverted hanged man, and the angels tell me that if I take his foot to instead be standing upon the moon as it goes through simple harmonic motion. This motion could also be seen as him going through a circular motion, front-to-back and up-and-down, creating a circle around his heart about the y- and z-axes.
They make additional analogies; if the hanged man bows before something greater than himself, that’s a certain kind of eclipse, but stretching back in ecstasy is a different kind of eclipse. There’s something about aligning with the Saturn cycle.
Now I’m atop a cross which is in outer space, and which is flying like a spaceship. At times it seems like a TOPY cross, but there seem to be fractal extensions of 2/3 size which emerge from the cross, forming a pattern. I see myself lying on the cross, with my heart at the center, causing it to fan out in a fractal pattern. I’m told that networks such as these need to meet other people so that they can grow again and not peter out at the natural upper limit of the fractal pattern. It’s like I’m traveling through space, and the cross becomes many of the same size, forming a simple bridge down to a planet. I touch the planet which is like unto Mars, but touching it causes a bit of blue to appear, terraforming it. I don’t know what this is, but on reflection, it’s a symbol of following the perpendicular in order to meet the center, or heart (note the six-rayed star in the LRP is made up of red and blue triangles); at the time, one side of the leaf I’m holding was saying “this is obvious,” the other side of the leaf was saying, “it’s not obvious at all.
They’re showing me the sun and the moon crossing each other, which of course follows this symbolism. I note that there’s an upcoming lunar eclipse, which I mistakenly think is in June (it’s in May), but they’re really trying to point me towards it. I don’t know what this is, but it’s important to them, and I’m grateful for the message.
Several times now it’s felt like the vision will stop, but it resumes. Now I see a diamond shape, a rhombus, which has a size of a diagonal that is three times the size of the other. There’s an additional correction to the symbol, which now has three-dimensionality; the main one is shown atop and rotating above a self-similar square pyramid:
Now I recall a symbol on the astral appearing like this appearing after I scried the Aethyr of ZIP about a year and a half ago. It was made of gold and I was able to use it to help me decipher tables I received about this time. It was three-dimensional and octahedral; the angels show me another one today, this time even thinner:
“You have a square (from the original symbol), but held at this angle [in three dimensions], it has to look like a rhombus.” Ultimately they say that the fusion of the old symbol with this new one is a means to perfect it. There’s a flexibility with the height of the octahedron, which I’d already had from the ZIP symbol. The angels emphasize the self-similarity.
The symbol floating above the mountain is similar to it floating above itself in the pyramid form, and there’s significance about it but I’m not to know about it. “Think of it like Re atop mounting, but because it’s merely reflecting Re, it’s like unto the moon.” The symbol is reflecting light onto the ground below, and I’m thinking of Egypt. It’s lighting up the ground below, and they’re saying that it could reflect any place on Earth. “The light will hit a central point,” and the energy will be like a thermal solar tower. I’m unclear, but the angels say that this is okay: this is laying the structure for what will happen at the end of this ritual.
There’s something about a dog, but the vision ends.
Sunrise: Same procedure as Day 2, except calling on King Babalel. Also, filing under “What Should Have Been Completely Obvious,” I place my right hand on the back of Leaf 47 (47b, which is at my right). I have my left foot on Babalel’s seal for balance.
I make the call to BAG. The vision starts with a hallway, which has a CGI feel. There’s set of double doors which I open, which shows another length of hallway with a set of doors at the end. This pattern repeats, and I zip through many hundreds of doors in this manner: these are the doors of the main sequence of letters from this side of the leaf. There are also sets of double doors to my left and right which represent those letters that I used my intuition to write in. I get to the last set of double-doors, which has the letter Van on it (the angels remind me that the first two letters are X & I, i.e., the transliteration of the Greek letter xi).
I open this last set of doors, and I seem to have opened a set of doors into the sky or heaven. I walk around through the sky, and they call it a hidden or alternative or mathematical Merkava. This is in the vein of the Merkava as Dee would have understood them, they tell me. I’m in a “chariot,” which is metaphorical: the chariot can be thought of as a force which allows me to traverse the heavenly realm. It’s bright and daylight; I can see the blue sky and there are clouds just below me.
I repeat the governors’ names: Labnixp, Focisni, Oxlopar. I see a set of 2D spirals, reddish (note that the moon is in Scorpio, thus the luminaries are both ruled by Mars today, which is Tuesday, the day of Mars). They create a square, and they ask me to step into the center of the square. I do so; they note the dimensionality but then say they won’t dwell on it in this vision. Reddish protrusions or perhaps the spirals themselves extend and come at me.
Now I’m at the center of a cube (so now we’re back to dimensionality); they remind me that from the center of the square, six square pyramids can be made, which can be made into three octahedra. This, they tell me, is the Glory of the Trinity. These are the signs of the zodiac in “duality”–the heavenly part and the earthly part, of each sign. “As above, so below,” they remind me. My mind alights on the idea of the fixed stars: “Not this vision,” they tell me.
I look at the three octahedra. They get tall and each forms a loop which come at me. Then I see the octahedra in normal form and they turn around me (counterclockwise from above), and two are shown as under my feet, supporting me, and one I’m holding as a rein. This clearly feels like I’m in a chariot. “This is how an individual can perceive a given moment of astrological influence. One can bring to mind a given planet, which is one of these modalities [cardinal, fixed, or mutable.]” The cube is sort of this earthly existence, the limits of being in one of these three states. One can feel like one is in a Black Iron Prison on account of either the earthly state of affairs itself being in one of these modalities, or feeling as if the strings are being pulled from heaven. Feeling like this would indicate a need for spherical consciousness.
I am curious as to where the chariot is going. I’m taken into a Roman-style stadium. It’s like the final leg of a triumph in the Roman sense. There’s cheering and the amphitheater itself is reflective of this spherical consciousness with the members of the audience being like unto the fixed stars (which we weren’t going to talk about? heh heh). So of course being cheered feels good, but note the emotional pull of all the possibilities which these fixed stars represent. I see a particular light flashing at me from the crowd. I float towards this spot and there’s a king who is flashing this light from a mirror.
The angels tell me to not look so much at what the king was getting me to do, but rather to look back at the center, the chariot. I can see my light body there, and it’s doing a better job of reflecting all of the fixed stars of possibility. I wonder what would happen if I expanded this out to all the places that the stars have been. They emotionally indicate that this is good, so my heart extends out.
Then I think about all of the possibilities that the stars could have been (to quote the Hole song: “My name is Might-Have-Been, my name is Never Was”), and that’s when I can see my heart extend into an amazing light show. This, is more of the rainbow body. I reflect during the vision that this is deep: when we think of possibilities, this is sort of a limiting idea or category. But if we think of all of those things that each possibility could have been, that’s sort of where Nuit and Hadit meet, to use Thelemic concepts. What if, for example, Jupiter had become a star instead of Sol? Honoring all of this in one’s heart and at all the levels of existence and awareness: this is key.
The vision ends.
Noon: Same procedure. Call to the Aethyr of BAG.
I now see the same spiral as show fourfold this morning, but it seems to come from in one form, and as a single point in the darkness. The spiral comes around me and I now appear energetically as I do in the Circulation of Light portion of the Middle Pillar Ritual. They back me up to see this energy field about me from afar and in the context of fixed stars. They mention that doing the Middle Pillar Ritual magnetizes the self, as it were, so that one can become a compass for the True Will, i.e., the particular set of fixed stars. This can, of course, become skewed by an imbalance of the elements, so the importance of the Lesser Ritual of the Pentagram is obvious.
Regardless, the angels have me dwell on the fixed stars, and mention that one can use the MPR to find one’s personal fixed stars, i.e., the “lode stars.” Still, I contemplate this: were someone to orient themselves to their fixed stars, it is a proper thing to do so in order to follow one’s True Will, but this is also somewhat insufficient in two senses. First, what I call “the shifting of the orbit,” i.e., the discovery of additional fixed stars or elements within oneself which causes an adjustment to the True Will. Second, there’s the importance of honoring all of the fixed stars, appearing not only as Hadit and Nuit (which is really just one thing, and not merely the principles of Chokmah and Binah, respectively, leading to each individual’s Tiphareth/sun), nor as their single unified unfolding and enfolding in spacetime as the unified process of Kether. Instead, considering the need to honor the possibilities of possibilities and the world of Adam Qadmon, the idea of the True Will becomes secondary. The True Will continues to speak to the heart and its configuration, but honoring the depths of all fixed stars not only as individual lode stars but possibilities which could have been very different–this is where one honors the world of Adam Qadmon and the unfolding force of Ain.
I ask how I am to honor this, then. The angels point ahead and say that something will come around Leaf 15–which is the fire tablet, the last of the Watchtower tablets, if one starts with the most dense of them (earth).
I speak in an offhanded way about being a good guest to the angels who are hosting me, and they begin speaking about hospitality (note that the single word “host,” which can refer to either a multitude of an army or to one who receives guests, both derive from the word for “stranger, guest, enemy”). They mention that each of the leaves gives me a full day and night as a guest in the heavenly homes which God has created, and that Day 49 is the central home, the home of homes, in the throne room, which I will “never leave” (in status) and tending to the kingdom. The traveling which I do will be as a monarch or viceroy traveling to different realms to tend to whichever realm requires it.
Sunset: Same procedure. Call to BAG.
The angel governors ask me to focus on the feeling of the leaf, and then to focus on the spiral, which was common to both visions. Then the angels tell me to put the feeling of the energy of that spiral into the vision of heaven from this morning. I put my vision there and include my energetic body there.
I notice that I need to put more energy into concentration than I normally would for an Aethyr this low. I interpret this as being similar to dealing with the Aethyr of ZAX–in other words, the sevenfold nature of doing the Aethyr call during gebofal is putting the abyssal feeling much lower. They tell me to focus on the spiral and note the increasing size of the length of a diagonal as you go from one corner of the page to the book and the similar increase and decrease in size of a spiral’s arcs extending out from the middle:
Each of these leaves is thus similar to a fractal. This fractal is not only across leaves (such as going from only 105 letters on Leaf 49 (which is reduced from a small number of words) to 4802 letters on Leaf 2, to Leaf 1b which has letters at the end but which complexifies into words at the top, and finally Leaf 1a which is all words) but also within a single leaf. This self-similarity relates to the “as above, so below” principle of Hermeticism.
I try to relate this to the vision of the Roman-style triumph and to the idea of honoring all of possibilities and how each possibility itself could have been different. This pattern of self-similarity, I realize, is the universe/Divine trying to honor itself and the decisions it has made. Therein is the unity and multiplicity of coming into existence in the manner it has, and the arising and falling of patterns from moment to moment.
My mind alights on the concept of vibration as I handle the leaf in my hand. The phenomenon of vibration honors the idea of development. A vibration is an anticipation of the future, which we then take stock of after the fact. The most important vibrations are those which are meaningful: that makes the difference as to whether development proceeds in a given trend as anticipated. The concept of personal resonance relates to this.
I’m trying to combine the ideas now with the idea of being centered amidst polarities and forces. Fractals shift levels and do so in apparently nonlinear fashion; the idea of accepting things as they are is important, and I see development as a matter of homeostasis, but at the same time, biology speaks of punctuated equilibria. We find these in traversing the heart by attempting to be accepting, so accepting that we pay attention and at times we find, either by natural change or by noticing that which comes to be noticed with our development–we come to notice that which changes how we perceive everything. In such times, it seems like everything changes, and if we’re okay with that, we accept and flow with the change.
These moments are when our hearts feel that they would leap out of our chests into the unknown, because we see our past, our present, our future, our selves, our loved ones, and our world: these we see clearly and anew.