Working with the Throne

One of the things I like to do is learn from and experiment with others’ experiences & techniques. One I recently found was Dean Hildebrandt’s description of the throne in the New Jerusalem in Revelations 21. Recall that “Jerusalem” was the location of the part of the Earth known as HUTMOCS.

I decided to explore this; and received guidance from the angels as to how. First, I was told to use my accounting for the eight letters of the name of the zodiacal king Lavavoth. The first letter, L, is omitted (referring to L/El, which in Enochian means “The First” and the unity of the Divinity); it winds up being used later. This shifts the first of the letters such that the throne is then named: VRVINVNEOCARNOGHCG, which I was later told was then to be followed by L as the name of the Divine, and they were to be used as the substitution for the Aethyr name in the call.

Preceding the call to the throne-as-Aethyr, I was to make the call to LIL, and before each call I was to make a short prayer, O remiges varpax, which may have the meaning of “Lord have mercy,” followed by Kyrie eleison (the Latin translation of same), three times. Finally, I was told to request a question and its answer, and then an empowerment.

I went ahead and did as told, and saw a throne, and the first thing I saw was a figure with a very tall crown, almost as if it were a pope’s hat, but instead was a crown made of intricate gold. “Resplendent” was the word that came to mind, and I became emotional. I was led partway to the throne by the 12 zodiacal king angels, and after a certain point I was to walk, so I did so, but prostrated fully every three steps (seven times/21 steps) along the way. I remained prostrated at the end.

The Divine appeared in feminine form, and reminded me that I was to request both a question and its answer from Her. “Yes,” I replied, and humbly asked Her for these. She smiled, bidding me to be still at first, then allowing me to approach. As I do, I see her seven angels around the throne, briefly appearing armed and as a warning at first with what looked like pikes with vajras at the end. Yet this was merely to show “This is what we can do,” and with the Divine having given Her leave, they now appear to be very soft and no longer appear as guards.

The Divine Herself appeared perhaps to ten to twelve feet tall, and I sat in Her lap, and She held me to her bosom. She thanked me for coming, telling me that it’s been a long journey and that there will continue to be journeys. What’s needed most for me, She continues, is health.

The question she has for me is “close to my heart”: “How does one continue to move with their heart aligned with the Cosmic [i.e., Divine] Heart?” The answer, she says, is in two parts. First, the heart is always aligned with the Cosmic heart: it’s a matter of maintaining awareness of that. Maintaining awareness of that is simply all that one needs to do, but in order to do that, one must be healed.

Next She reminds me that I was to ask for an empowerment, which I humbly do. I feel an energy about my heart, like a golden snake or coil, illuminating brightly a bright golden-white light. My solar plexus is feeling lit up by this, but the Divine instructs me to maintain awareness of my heart. She shows me an intricate, infinite metal tower, like a fleur-de-lis going out/up to infinity, and it is lit up by a brightly lit background, almost blindingly so. It is my heart, and She reminds me to maintain awareness on it, and how vast and how eternal that is, and to allow myself to merge with that. There are many red jewels, (rubies correspond to Mars but Star Rubies to Chokmah in 777) occasionally green also, but mainly red—I am to own the dominance of red jewels on the gold metalwork. She shows me some blue jewels as well (sapphires correspond to Jupiter but Star Sapphires to Binah), and finally to black diamonds (corresponding to the World of Adam Qadmon and Ain/Ain Sof/Ain Sof Aur).

“Now let the healing be complete,” She says. She’s working Her Will that my background awareness always be on my heart being aligned to the Divine Heart. She shows it overcoming areas of tension (such as in my body), and that this will improve in time. She concludes with a kiss, and we end in Union.

Gebofal, Day 29

Sunrise: Call to Aethyr of ARN (twice). Call to King Bobogel (twice). Each call made twice due to suboptimal concentration and attention the first go-round.

I see a sphere approach and it is soooo close to the Aethyr of LIL. There’s this rainbow light within it, hitting the surface of the sphere. I see a horizontal ring, like the equator, about it, and it holds my hands as a dance partner, each of us rotating about the other.

It’s like God is saying, “Here you see the sphere of LIL, but you see it as one at the equator: you see the maximally defining ring of the Aethyr of LIL” (i.e., of all the rings of the sphere of LIL, this is the most like unto it, or from which more of that sphere can be correctly extrapolated than any other ring). “You see that here now,” the voice finishes.

The angels note how in previous visions, I saw this as a highly stellated geometric figure. Now, instead, they are saying, because my heart is properly aligned, and functioning properly according to the desires of God, then instead I’m seeing the sphere in its fullness, but I’m seeing it as one who is orbiting about this equator. I thank the angels for this, and they’re saying that, every so often today, to feel that gravity of the realm of Adam Qadmon. The angels show that to me now, and it very much feels like a pull.

I interject briefly about the discrepancy between the order of the Watchtower tablets as they relate to Amzes Naghezes Hardeh; recall that when Edward Kelley accidentally said some of the words of Leaf 18 aloud, he was attacked by gnome-spirits of that leaf! This would suggest that the leaf itself is of the nature of Earth. Yet earth is the last of the elements in the Enochian system (clockwise from east, the order is Fire/East (upper-left in the Great Table), Air/South (upper-right), Water/West (lower-right), Earth/North (lower-left)). This would mean that the reverse order of the leaves should be:

  • Leaf 21 (today’s leaf): Aethyr of ARN
  • Leaf 20 (tomorrow’s leaf): Aethyr of LIL (highest and final Aethyr)
  • Leaf 19 (Tuesday’s leaf): Earth
  • Leaf 18: Water
  • Leaf 17: Air
  • Leaf 16: Fire

And the order of these leaves would repeat, with leaves 15, 11, & 7 being related to Earth; Leaves 14, 10, & 6 being related to Water; Leaves 13, 9, & 5 being related to Air; and Leaves 12, 8, & 4 being related to Fire. Leaf 3 would be related to invocation, and Leaf 2 to evocation; for these, I intend to use the usual Tablet of Union, an abbreviated version thereof (with only the letters EHNB on it), and finally a fused version with just the Enochian letter L written in white with a black background, and red and green for the two left tails). Finally, Leaf 1, which has been associated with silence (the true first silent call), I will instead read aloud as the (currently I associate this with “the center” but I’m sure my awareness will be thoroughly calibrated whenever I read Leaf 1 aloud!).

But the problem, as you can see, is that Leaf 18, associated as it was with gnomes and thus Earth, is associated with Water in this scheme.

The angels advise me that placing my feet on all four of the Watchtower tablets will be sufficient. They say that Leaf 18 was indeed associated with gnomes/Earth for Kelley and when I myself transcribed this leaf. “Don’t be surprised,” they wink, “if the order shifts around on you.” They tell me to look up the original Great Table, so I do. Stefan Neil Klemenc has one of the best websites summarizing the Enochian system at kondor.de (I’ve found it highly valuable): linked is his summary of the Great Table and the revision known as the Tabula Recensa.

The change here is key: the tablet order was, at first, Fire-EarthAirWater. This would mean that, at least as far as creating Amzes Naghezes Hardeh (Liber Loagaeth), the order seemed to be a reversal of the order of the original table: Water (Leaf 16), Air (Leaf 17), Earth (Leaf 18: welcome to gnomes!), and Fire (Leaf 19). Fire, the element associated with the highest (because it is least dense) thus would abut the Aethyr of LIL, the highest Aethyr. All of this is speculation, and cannot be confirmed without additional analysis. However, at least I have a hypothesis which I can test experientially by placing my feet on all four of the Watchtower tablets and noting which which tablet appears to be activated on each of the four days.

Returning to the vision: I’m shown a tree again. “Lo, the entirety of the tree now: all of these sephiroth within you are as one tree, and all the seeds of the tree are within you. And now it is time to become the fullness of this tree, the extent of this tree and the center of the tree, to become all of these at once, Son of Man, Son of God, Son of Earth, and to know them in their fullness. For this is given unto you that others may know His blessings: and indeed, such compassion thou hast sought to have: feel it now, in its Fullness, that others may take of you these seeds, and recognize them to be the seeds that they [those who take the seeds] always were. Indeed, when they take such a seed, it is merely that they are taking the reflection that they have of themselves already, of who they truly are, but could not see it, except in a reflection as from the mirror image of a sphere.”

I’m feeling a lot of energy coming up off of the seal of King Bobogel, and a lot more energy is coming off now, and this is not unlike the energy of LIL, and I’m sort of being lifted up, and I can feel an entire change to my energy, and as I focus on the compassion and jewel, it becomes multiplied several times over. And the Divine is saying unto me: “More shall be shown to you: indeed, this be a stepwise process, but more and more shall be shown unto you, so Infinite are His mercies.”

I note a change to my sinuses. I see a vast Light from a vast Source, but it is partly shadowed. It is as if an angelic figure, or perhaps the Divine Himself, is blocking out the Fullness of it, lest it blind me. I’m told, “Yea, you are being attuned. The eye which you have to see such is growing in health and robustness, and so we shall prepare this vessel, and this subtle body, to be able to handle both.”

I await to see if God hath more for me. “Much love hath God unto you, Son of Man, Son of God, Son of Earth! Lo, look upon this seal.” I see two concentric rings such as one would see about a globe (the upper half visible), which has two half-rings above which quarter the half-globe. And I see several trees come up out of it: one of these is me, and there’s this very strong connection, like a strong welding of a strong metallic link to another. I see no less than three other places on the globe, representing other people, whom I am being indelibly linked with karmically, and the Lord says, “This will be a sign unto you, that your heart may know no doubt. Rest easy, Son of Man, Son of God, Son of Earth, for PRONOA is arising in you!”

Thus ends the vision.

Noon: Similar procedure.

The angels show me the sphere/planet with the equator as in the previous vision. This time, the angels are saying, this is the ring of the one who orbits the sphere of LIL, which is who I am right now.

The scene changes and there’s unfolding from this sphere: the “crust” of the planet splits along half of the “equator,” which opens like an eye, but it opens fully and there is only the white sphere which I see now. The angels set the crust aside. The sphere looks like an eye and for a moment seems to miss the iris and pupil, but now I see a pupil–without an iris–with a slight indentation about it. It’s like the light, non-shadow side of the Death Star. It’s looking at me and it bids me to come closer and closer, so I do.

It’s like it wants me to gaze into it, and I do. It’s a purely white sphere with something of a hole in the middle. As I stare into it, it returns its gaze directly into my third eye, with its beam from its aperture. I continue to look directly at it, and continue to generate compassion, which changes all of my subtle body. I continue to generate compassion, and this increases the intensity as I’m able to increase the intensity of my compassion. We continue to gaze into each other.

There’s a bit of an angelomorphic process. My subtle body seems to grow wings which look like folding fans which open up. I continue to stare, and these wings seems to multiply in number out from the tips of the previous wing: more fan-wings appear in a doubling manner, in different colors, so that eventually they wrap around the entire eye-planet in a beautiful variegation. This seems to be a fusion of the two of us now: the space between my manifold-wing-sphere and the white sphere that I’m about decreases. It’s like shrink-wrap as I close upon this beautiful sphere.

We now nudge slightly closer to this portal to the realm of Adam Qadmon in our orbit. As we do so, it’s like each of the various colors of my wings seem to light up, and they take on a shimmer, but it’s like we’re also rotating, so the entire surface of this planetary sphere seems to light up in this gorgeous shimmering of colors. It’s like a rainbow disco-ball. It’s like we’re peeling off and molting, and it’s like these little topmost layers of these wings come away and become a bridge of myself into this realm. It’s all a beautiful morphing of myself, and this beautiful vision into this other aspect of God, that He has made available unto me in His mercies and transforming action.

“Lo, We are One! All is One!” I am told. There’s one last burst of light the God wants to give unto me to completely re-energize and transform me. “Rest now, Son of Man, Son of God, Son of Earth,” He says. I hesitate, but ask whether He, in His Mercy, has anything else, and I see something like the following:

A reflective cylinder amidst a massive rainbow burst of light. Difficult to show this, and obviously I’m not much of an artist, so just know it looked way better than this.

The sense I get is that I’m in this long cylinder or tunnel. Lest I become blown out, the Divine decides to close the vision.

Sunset: Similar procedure. Note: My speech was very rapid in this vision, and I’m sure that not everything got copied down.

Already, just reading off the angelic names, I could already feel the change in my subtle body. I’m trying to maintain the magnetism which comes from the compassionate rainbow spherical jewel, which keeps me on this path to the portal to realm of Adam Qadmon.

The angels confirm that, yes, if I go by the numbers in the actual calls (on the 19 days following LIL), I will have clues as to which zodiacal king to call upon that day.

Now the angels twist me into a tube, then twist me into something like fusilli, and then they twist that around again: twisting upon twisting upon twisting! At the same time, they say that this twisting is like about a Möbius strip, and they constantly select another place along it for the twisting to occur. It’s happening along all of these different dimensions, they say, and don’t tell me how many–but it is many. This is the final preparation for the spherical consciousness about many dimensions. “It is manifold.” It’s looking like an ouroboros, a highly twisting snake eating its tail.

I return to concentrating on this rainbow body jewel, and I see it open up and flower, and another shoot up from the bloom to itself grow and open and flower, but I increase the pace so that it creates something of a vibration to this self-recursion that returns me to the image of the rainbow body jewel.

I am in awe of everything that is happening. I see this light coming at me and it is somewhat obscured, mainly because I’m not quite at LIL, but I recall the illusion of motion that occurs in filmmaking in which the blank screen of every other frame is ignored by the mind in favor of the sequence of images which appear seamless to the individual. Or, alternatively, a prior vision in which someone waves their hand in front of your eyes and you can still see the general motion of what’s happening in front of you. I’m told that if I maintain concentration on this compassionate heart, symbolized in this rainbow body jewel, everything will become clearer and clearer as in these analogies. There’s this play in this obscured light now: where there was shadow, there is now light, and vice versa, and the light and shadow continue to alternate their places.

I try to speed up their alternation to get a better sense of what I’m seeing, and it’s this beautiful plasma globe. The angels say that because I’ve already wrapped myself about the sphere with my manifold wings-upon-wings, the light or energy is already happening to my entire subtle body. Now it’s a matter of trying to even everything out and prepare my for my next step.

My mind glimpses ahead to the bridge into the realm of Adam Qadmon from yesterday’s vision. I continue to see myself preparing to be poured into this the day after tomorrow. “Just the tiniest of glimpses,” the angels caution: they can only show me so much. I’m feeling this massive light pouring through me now, in all its varieties, and I’m trying to accept and show compassion, and accept and show compassion, for this entire process. It’s like I’m melting, I’m this metal which is melting in the furnace. I’m to be re-forged and be perfected in the light of His Holiness and His Mercies. And I’m so grateful for all of this.

The angels say, “There is much more to be said unto you, and much more for you to say. You will go through life like this: it is as if you are dead but so alive at the same time! It is like you are shown to be like this beacon, like this unending energy of fusion. It’s like you will be a sun unto the world, but at the same time, but ‘If the salt loses its saltiness,’ what good is it?” The angels say a similar thing can happen: if the sun loses the planets which orbit it, what good is it? And if it brings not Life unto the Earth, and if it brings not joy upon the people who live thereon, then what good is it?

The angels tell me to go forward! And I see this massive geometry of a palace, and so much is happening right now: it’s very difficult to keep up, and I continue to try to do so, and the angels say, “Lo! This and more tomorrow, this and more on the following nineteen days, and lo! You shall be transformed, Son of Man, Son of God, Son of Earth! Look forward to this with Joy, with Humility, and with Exultation!” And I say, “I do, and I do, and I do!” and thus ends the vision.

Gebofal, Day 27

Sunrise: Call to Aethyr of PAZ. Call to King Baligon.

I relax and concentrate on the lotus-rose. The angels note that this is an incremental step as I approach the event horizon of the portal to the world of Adam Qadmon, which appears to me as a black hole.

Continuing to concentrate on the lotus-rose, the angels show it becoming circular, like an ouroboros, spinning around. “This is how the the flower emerged from your heart, is it not?” the angels ask. I agree, in the sense that the stem of flower emerged from the blossom of the preceding flower, repeatedly. The angels say that there will be this circulation within the lotus-rose itself. There will be suffering leading to transcendence, which will lead to suffering and then further transcendence.

Yet the suffering itself, they’re saying, is something that can be relatively avoided in the mundane realm just by continuously giving yourself “oomph” to follow rules and behave appropriately such that suffering can be transcended (such as seen in the symbolism of the white cube). I note difficulty concentrating, but the angels remind me to simply focus on this lotus-rose of my heart, and the distraction will go away.

I see this lotus-rose now being like unto a torus, simplifying now into a jewel about the lotus-rose (note the parallel to the famous Buddhist mantra, Om Mani Padme Hum). The angels say that once you get this, that it’s all sort of “one thing…you’ve been making this distinction between the thorny stem and the blossom. But it is One Thing: it is a Beautiful, sometimes Wonderful, sometimes Heart-Aching sort of thing, and the Heart Aching indicates the Heart, and that It is Alive.” So the Heart Aching as such is–and here I recall the death of my late mother-in-law–the Heart Aching is…and I’m trying to come to terms with something really big here.

“The Heart Aching,” the angels are saying, “is the Condition of the Heart. Though the armor about it is Empty, this pain is normal, this pain is okay. And the condition of Reality leading up to the heart being like This, is okay. And all of this can be concentrated into this Divine Bloom of the flower itself, the Okayness of It All, the Divinity of It All, and the Transcendent Nature that allows it to happen such as This. All of it is okay, all of it can be concentrated.”

So even though it seems as if “the Jewel is in the Heart of the Lotus,” truly, the jewel itself is the lotus, is what the angels are saying, and it’s part of Understanding the depth of Adam Qadmon, which is a journey you shall take and fulfill and complete. That is the Beauty of the Journey. So that’s it: the angels note that I’m a little bit closer in my orbit to the portal; this Realm is a little big closer. All of this is the sphere [spherical consciousness], the angels are just keeping me a little bit off, keeping me at bay. They really want everything to attune, so this is something that I need to reflect on. I thank the angels, and they have nothing further.

Thus ends the vision.

Noon: Similar procedure. I called on King Baligon twice.

I concentrate on the lotus-rose as an Ouroboros, as well as a jewel, as described in the previous Aethyr. I steady myself.

I see two square pyramids, connected by a tube, and all of them appear to be be made out of dough; the tube is already tied into a knot. “Consider the force which ties this knot. This is the force of Ain, and the duality, you’ve seen this already, when you scried your own rainbow body using the call of the Aethyrs.” This knot, they say, can be considered like unto sphericity (of LIL), or the double-sphere arising out of the torus.

“Yet, there’s something nice and squishy about this, isn’t there? So that only if you were rather skilled could you even see that this was caused by a single force which created the illusion of duality, then united it, and then unfolded it throughout separate sephiroth.” So I’m wondering about the nature of these two pyramid-like, or tetrahedron-like (and here they tell me that they are tetrahedra). Here we have, once again, an ogdoad (two tetrahedra times four faces per tetrahedron), becoming an ennead (via the connecting tube), which perhaps could be considered a decad (due to the new shape created by the knot). So you have this reflection of the ten sephiroth, even in the world of Adam Qadmon.

I’m curious as to what this means. If everything is squishy, there’s an infinity with this. I try hard to understand this deeply. I let my heart work on this problem. The angels say, “Note that what you’re seeing as an ouroboros: this is the same kind of thing. It’s a symbol of continuity, much like a Möbius strip, or a Klein bottle (which may be a better explanation). It’s this twisting about itself. The reason you’re seeing it as seemingly separate forces is because you’ve already seen it as such (when I scried my rainbow body previously, I saw two jewels which mirrored each other), but also,” and here they bid me pause for a moment, “Think about this. This is three dimensions about three dimensions, coming upon itself. This is like unto the present state/earth on the left, the goal state/heaven on the right, and the transformation in the middle, so time is locked in as well. But it’s all one thing.

“It’s all one thing, and it’s a multiplicity of things.” And I feel like I’m very close to grokking this and they chuckle, “not just yet, but this is very important. This is a very potent symbol for you, because you’re very excited by this, and you want to know what it is, and that’s okay. That’s good.”

I take a look at the symbol, and I see it extending down, and now it seems like a bunch of pencils tied together with a rubber band in the middle, the other end of which is dangling from the ceiling. This point at which the rubber band meets the ceiling is the portal into the world of Adam Qadmon. “If you just take this heart of compassion and aim it directly at this symbol, you’ll see that this is the same thing. On the one hand if you twist it together, it’s the jewel, on the other hand if you were to take it apart, you could see one end being like unto the thorny end of the lotus-rose, and the other end like unto the bloom thereof. It’s all the same thing: all is one, all is one, all is one.”

The angels leave me with all of this to contemplate. I ask whether there’s anything else, and the angels bid me pause and to consider this dough-symbol floating in water–not dissolving, just floating.

The vision ends.

Sunset: Similar procedure.

I’m feeling fairly high right now. The angels tell me to relax and to speed up the entire process going from the previous symbolism to the lotus-rose to the jewel. I feel the gem now in its fullness; at first it seems to have an amber or reddish-orange tinge, but now I see green flashing in it, and the angels suggest that I add indigo and blues, and I see now: the jewel is a rainbow jewel. The angels remind me that the lights can come from the realm of Adam Qadmon in their fullness, but that they can be seen in Chokmah, and indeed, this is the final Aethyr of this sephirah. At its most developed they shine through to me now, they say. One need not have completely entered the realm of Adam Qadmon to see them this way, but having an opening into it is important in order to shine in your fullness (suggestive of a complete opening into Chokmah and a necessary step to develop the rainbow body).

Now I’m feeling a lot of energy coming off of the leaf, and it’s trying to tell me something, so I listen. I feel my crown chakra being pulled upward, an uncharacteristically strong energetic feeling for this Aethyr. It’s like this is the initiation, the re-initiation into Kether (the angels remind me that a prior sigil of mine with the intent of “I reinitiate into Kether” was, in fact, still active). The angels say, “Be prepared, be ready, Son of Man, Son of God, Son of Earth! This be the final vision of Chokmah unto you. Know this: that the different elements and the different spacings [of (space-time) points], that one may find as one abideth in the realm of Adam Qadmon: these can always shift and change! It is important to be fully immersed in the Understanding in order to be fully immersed in the Wisdom.

“Behold, this vision (from noon, of the dough shape), which you have seen in its tetrahedral format: this steeping of it in the water can be considered like unto the fullness of Ain and Ain Soph. For within the Ain is the Ain Soph, and that fullness containeth within it the Infinite Light, which you see before you, twisted into this shape, twisted into this Present-Future state, which is always, always, always bound both by time, but, indeed, by the supernals as a whole. And so, know this, Son of Man, Son of God, Son of Earth: the richness of this symbol will continue to unfold itself to you. For now, it seemeth like dough: tomorrow it shall not seem quite so. It shall take on a greater significance and a new symbolic meaning. Rest now easy, Son of Man, Son of God, Son of Earth! No more can be said unto you directly, but all of these things shall be open unto you in the very few weeks left remaining.

“Much love upon thee: go now in peace. Serve the Lord.”

With this, the vision ends.

Gebofal, Day 26: The LIT Aethyr!

Sunrise: Call to Aethyr of LIT and the associated governors and Zodiacal Kings. Call to King Bynepor.

I just pour forth this compassion of the lotus-rose, to all of the angels and everything about me, and in so doing I become this rotation, this torus, again. I’m approaching spherical consciousness, very close to it, almost there, even though I’m on the fifth Aethyr and four more remain. There’s a little bit of a shimmer on the surface of the sphere, a tiny ripple, going about this torus/sphere. As I do so, the angels acknowledge that if I increase my concentration perfectly, I could probably hit perfectly spherical consciousness from here.

The angels are showing me a tree, and the angels note that a torus could be superimposed around the trunk, under the branches, and above the roots, but also a sphere could be circumscribed about the tree as a whole. If you change the parameters of the torus to make a double-sphere, then the dimensions of a tree can roughly be matched. The angels have me consider the twisting motion of a torus (like if you twisted a rubber hose whose ends were connect, so that the inside turned out and the outside turned in), the constant rotation which relates to the varieties of fortune.

I relate this to Adam Qadmon again, unintentionally. The angels say that this is okay. “Your mind can’t help but do that.” That can be considered like unto this force, they say, of Adam Qadmon, which can be considered like unto the force of the black-hole portal (I repeat, I’m aware of the difference between a black hole and a wormhole–this is the realm of metaphor). This is the force of Ain, which has its own dynamic when it becomes realized.

Things may change up, especially below the Abyss, where it might seem more chaotic. Here, above the abyss, it’s just this gentle rotation. They relate this vision back to the aethyr of ICH, and say this is when a certain character from that computer code gets sucked in to the supernals ahead of what might seem to be its schedule. That’s all part of this multidimensional rotation of spherical consciousness due to the multiplex force of Ain. The outer portion of the entire torus can be considered the realm of ICH itself. Likewise, one could extrapolate to some degree the inside of the abyss, which is to say Fortune seeming to shine on an individual, which for some may cause things to seem to “go well”: the Abyss, or Fortune, works good for themselves.

Getting back to the Aethyr of LIT, I consider how this relates to the tree I just saw. The angels note how that inner ring, where things are “going well”–and here King Bynepor comes to the fore to speak–“This regeneration, this generation of the tree, is like Fortune, or the Lot of Fortune, or the Wheel of Fortune, or the Torus of Fortune, hitting that tree and bringing about the growth, and you see outgrowth of that fortune in the general shape of the torus,” twisting upward in one sense [i.e., upper trunk and branches] but downward in another sense [lower trunk and roots].

I try to maintain concentration, and use this lotus-rose from my heart to do so. “Ah,” the angels say, “let’s take a look at this lotus-rose. So here we have this combination of pain within suffering [the thorns], that black sphere, and we have the portion beyond the abyss, the nice layers of the whitish petals, which are the post-abyssal consciousness (supernals).

“Separate two things,” they say. “The rotation of the sphere is caused by this force of the world of Adam Qadmon, which is ‘World without End,’ which has multiple dynamics when they hit this reality.” But what the angels are saying now is, “Look to…” (here I note my difficulty concentrating), “look to…

“The dynamic of Adam Qadmon is that space, right?” I try to remagnetize my heart, and that helps. The angels show that if you remagnetize to this space, you can consider that to be the general forward linear path toward the portal into this realm of Adam Qadmon. I vibrate the angels’ names, and they say to hold for a moment, and to relax.

“This forward path of the infinite line of Adam Qadmon–this forward path, this constant path, this walking of this path, this traversing of the path: this is one who has become magnetized to the line approaching Adam Qadmon. When one is in spherical consciousness, one remains about–revolving about the world of Adam Qadmon, in that consciousness, but it is not the line which enters it. One is caught up in the revolution of this spherical consciousness about Adam Qadmon, but in order to enter it, in order to realize the Enochian phrase which I’d previously translated, “CASASAM MAOFFAS QAA DE MIAM DE TON DAMPLOZ OLPIRT” (the abiding measureless garment [“created form”] of the continuance of all variety of light (i.e., the rainbow body))–in order to realize this, one has to be magnetized to the infinity. The angels clarify: there’s the bounded infinity of a spherical consciousness, and then there’s the unbounded infinity, which is the rainbow body, the boundless unfolding of that. A set of fixed stars can be considered an infinite direction that one goes, but in order to have compassion for all of those fixed stars, and thereby enter into a more infinite arrangement, one needs to take the path of the infinite line, and not merely the orbit of the (bounded) infinite sphere which orbits about the portal to the world of Adam Qadmon. You can have this infinite compassion, and continue upon it, but you won’t know the revolution about this infinite consciousness.

Complicated! But not overly so. The angels have set me straight, and I express my gratitude to them. Thus ends the vision.

Noon: Similar procedure; I make two calls to King Bynepor and two to the Aethyr, just because I sense my attention wandering.

I concentrate my heart upon this lotus-rose and I try to remain magnetized to the path toward the world of Adam Qadmon. The angels are showing me the same sphere, with the smallest of ripples upon it, and I can see tiny rainbows about the surface (again, this seems like vast distances across Aethyrs are being bridged now; usually such forthright visions of the sphere do not occur until later in the process).

The angels relate the rainbow and ripples to the energy of being near the orbit of the portal to the realm of Adam Qadmon. This is a metaphorical Roche effect. In principle, the angels say, this rainbow lighting is Chokmah energy to a degree, but that tiny ripple is due to the (metaphorical) gravity of the realm of Adam Qadmon. It’s that the sphere is approaching this metaphorical Roche limit, and I feel my heart being pulled towards that portal, because I have been working to remain magnetized to this path.

I ask the angels what else, in their generosity or mercy they or the Almighty may have. They suggest nudging myself a little bit closer towards this portal, so that I can feel and be truly magnetized to this path towards the realm of Adam Qadmon. The angels say to take the next few days to approach and, on Monday, to actually enter the event horizon of this portal.

The following 18 days, I’m told, will be an attuning to the elements in such a way that one doesn’t become imbalanced as one reaches this realm of Adam Qadmon. Note here, again, the importance of balanced elements appears again, as at key phases in the magical journey: Knowledge and Conversation of the Holy Guardian Angel, Crossing the Abyss, and now full realization of the realm of Adam Qadmon.

I see myself being slowly pulled closer to this portal. The angels say to think about the absolute minimum distance and to hold there. After 18 days, I will be in that event horizon, and on the 19th day I’ll be crossing into this realm, fully balanced and aware of the powers at play, including states that can arise astrologically and elementally (which is to say, changing the relative distance of geometric points vis a vis Chokmah, using the elements–this is a deep metaphor about the heart). I’m also told that to some degree this can be done with time (Saturn).

I express my gratitude. The angels say that there’s nothing for this particular scrying, and thus ends the vision.

Sunset: Similar procedure. Pain, depression, anxiety, about halfway between the prior scrying session and this one. Took anxiolytic.

The angels point out that I have kept the lotus-rose as a focus to magnetize me to the path to the portal into the world of Adam Qadmon. The angels advise that I stay on this path. “Don’t revert back, don’t deviate in any direction.”

The angels ask me to reflect on the rotation of the near-spherical consciousness which orbits this portal. They say that as long as I retain this spherical consciousness, that the rotation that I’m going won’t matter so much. Although today was a bit trying, they note, it’s an important reminder to continue to stay focused on this path, and on the world of Adam Qadmon. If I’m truly to make this transition, then I really shouldn’t be sidelined by events such as today’s. There will be other days that will be even more difficult, they comment. I take this to heart, and “in heart,” as it were. The angels say that the only way to get around the reality of daily difficulties is to work on the heart, and come from the heart, and to be pulled forward as by the heart.

At this point I realize that I haven’t called the zodiacal kings or the governors; the angels say that this is okay. I see some energy from the rotation of this sphere, coming as a result of proximity to this portal of Adam Qadmon. It’s a whirlwind (looking not unlike the effect of sling rings of Doctor Strange comics). Others are being drawn into this energy. It’s like I can’t help myself, I reply: I continue that motion. “That’s okay,” reply the angels. “That’s the circumference: you are tending to the circumference. Just ensure that your heart is aligned, dead center, to the portal, exactly to the path.”

I decide to vibrate the kings’ and governors’ names now. The angels say that this act was good, and that it heightened their power a bit, and to just always do so to just ensure that every part of the ritual includes calling from this path to the world of Adam Qadmon. Obviously, this is paramount to them now.

Now the angels explain that there’s only so much that they can show me without my getting pulled on this path in even more (i.e., to a later Aethyr before its time). They tell me to have my heart at ease: this is the right path. They bid me continue to stay focused: anything to do with the elements that they have to show me, if given early, will pull me into the event horizon of the portal into the realm of Adam Qadmon. Each part of this process needs to be taken slowly and deliberately. Even though these scrying sessions seem short, there’s a lot of karma being burned off, a lot of realignment, a lot of karma being played out. That allows me to continue directly forward, they advise. The angels tell me not to worry: my karma is being safeguarded right now, and to just not accrue new karma. These steps are causing it to be “burned off” or “played out,” so that I can go dead center into the portal without being imbalanced.

I express my gratitude to the angels, and ask if there’s anything else. “You can always take on the spherical consciousness” gained from my previous scrying sessions, they note, without actually invoking these higher Aethyrs, so if I wish to be more balanced, I may do that. “Just don’t try to leap ahead anymore” during the visions of the actual Aethyr scryings. They will actively block that.

With that, they close the vision, and I give my heartfelt thanks to the angels.

Gebofal, Day 25: Halfway there!

Sunrise: Call to Aethyr of MAZ, call to King BNASPOL (twice). It is somewhat more difficult for me to concentrate in the morning, which is to be expected (sunrise today was 15 minutes after I woke up).

I try to greet everything with lovingkindness, the symbolism of which is compressed into this lotus-rose symbol. I’m definitely feeling the energy. I see the symbol of a circle and its center; I’m seeing it rotate in 3D space and blink into a 3D eyeball (a not uncommon symbol in these higher Aethyrs). I’m told to travel into the eyeball, which I do; I’m at the very center of the eyeball, the focus of the light (this is reminiscent of a previous vision of these higher Aethyrs). Once again, I looking around and I’m seeing the infinite light of Adam Qadmon. I’m told, “Yes, indeed, this is it.”

The light is coming straight through my heart. I look all about me and I’m seeing these varieties of possibilities floating upon the retina of the eye, and also the shadows of possibilities which will never be. I see myself merge with the vitreous humor of the eye. I’m becoming like unto it, and quiet. This is like unto Ayin / Ain. I look about me–nay, I swirl all about me within this eye. I hear, “I Am That I Am! I Am That I Am! I Am That I Am, Son of Man, Son of God, Son of Earth!”

I feel myself distributed throughout the entire cosmos, now in the form of a man, of Adam Qadmon. It is beautiful, it is wonderful. “‘Wonderful’ be the word, Son of Man, Son of God, Son of Earth.” “Be there anything else that one could become?” “Indeed, one could become any one thing,” saith the Lord, “but it is best to become all things, one and multiple.”

I am so grateful for this. I feel God taking my body and swaying it to the left and right, and now I’m swirling about the y/z plane, rotating and rotating, and I’m seeing these droplets come off of me–thousands, millions, even billions of droplets. These are all of the planets of life which exist out in the cosmos. My heart just pours out to all of them. And the lotus-rose appears in a few of these places, and God seems to wish to end the vision. And I cry out before he does so, “O God, what wonders you have wrought!”

“Indeed, Son of Man, Son of God, Son of Earth. Behold, PRONOA operates within you, and, yea, within those to come.”

With that, thus ends the vision. Wow.

Noon: Yesterday I had some unexpected scheduling come up, so I was over half an hour late getting this call started. Otherwise, a similar procedure. Also: we’re now at the halfway point: the middle ritual of the middle day!

The angels note that there’s some pressure that my body is under; they’re trying their best to relax me, and I try to also help by consciously relaxing. The angels are twisting my subtle body gently, and at this point I’m tempted to call to MAZ a second time to improve the transmission.

The angels bid me hold. I see two fingers on a hand walking upon a surface. It’s like it’s either the fingers of God or of Adam Qadmon; the angels say that the distinction doesn’t matter right now. I vibrate the angels’ names, but the vision does not change, so this is indeed what I’m supposed to be seeing.

Nonetheless, I make the call to MAZ again. I see fingers walking along a surface, and this surface, I can now see, is a sphere. It’s unclear whether this “walking” motion turns the globe, or whether the fingers are made to walk along the already-spinning globe. I’m told that these fingers are consciousness that must alight upon the Earth, upon the world. The angels note that the fingertips, although sensitive, are not as intelligent as the rest of Adam Qadmon.

I try to lead with the compassion of the lotus-rose again. I’m seeing the bloom of the lotus-rose spreading out of the fingertips upon the surface of the planet. It leaves this grand compassion with each contact of the finger upon the planet. I concentrate in order see better; I note the energy I’m feeling off of Leaf 25a (which, starting from the back of the book and moving forward, is the first half-leaf with all of the letters (2401) and which has them all in regular vertical alignment), which I’ve been feeling much of the day. I also note the energy coming off of the seal of King BNASPOL.

I maintain high concentration. I see the fan unfold again. The angels repeat, “Look at the fan, look at the fan.” I see the fan unfold, and the angels liken each of the folds to an arm of a stellation. The angels note that they are representing a 3D concept in 2D. They point out that the degree to which some things are folded and some are not (which is to say, the evenness of the folding across the folding fan) is a function of the balance of the elements within a being. That’s why it’s so very hard, because even if one oneself is balanced, they interact with some people who have an imbalance in their energetic make-up. One has to work very hard to manage the balance within themselves but also with everything that’s interacting with them in the moment.

I ask how these ideas fit together. The angels show me that what’s required for “flowering” to take place among [the peoples of] humanity is a very real sense that everybody is managing everybody else’s karma, and this is not easy. There needs to be this attempt to balance the elements, which in and of itself is fine, but also recognize that certain things are going to take a while to unfold about the sphere of Binah (i.e., certain aspects must be understood in order to be received there). So people should continue to move in their efforts to do so, but certain unfoldings of arrangements of points in Chokmah can’t be forced within an individual’s time frame. One can’t force space-time to adhere to one’s will. If something is going be Understood, and to unfold in all of its varieties, then that is a process that requires a certain amount of time. There’s just no getting around it. At the same time, that doesn’t mean that beautiful moments at the suboptimal level cannot happen (e.g., some individuals having Wisdom and Understanding, but such being beyond others).

I ask the angels if there’s anything else, and they say, “No.” I comment on the difficulty of this Aethyr, and the angels say, “The timing was off, and though you did persist with it, it’s tough. What are you going to do?” they chuckle, referencing my householder status.

I express my gratitude, and the vision ends.

Sunset: Similar procedure.

I see a cylinder about me again. It bends back into a torus. The dimensions change such that it turns into a double-sphere. This sphere, they’re saying, could stellate, further, as I’ve seen in previous visions, but for now they are keeping it simple with the torus just turning into a sphere. I express my gratitude. The angels show that if this were a highly stellated image, there would be thousands of points upon it.

They show what it would look like for this nearly spherical stellation to orbiting very closely to a black hole. There are little lights of energy about the tips of these arms of the stellation, points of fire or possibly the arms breaking away. The angels advise that this will not happen in this case. Instead, it will create a dynamic such that the stellation near-sphere will become more spherical as it goes along. Nonetheless, there’s this energy to this close orbit. What I’m experiencing right now, the angels explain, is this energy, this dynamic: a little bit of pain, a little bit of unease, this concern that I may be reverting. This is normal: I’m taking the right route that, if I find myself imbalanced, requesting forgiveness and moving along with the symbolism of this lotus-rose.

The angels are saying now, “If you are looking closely, you are feeling more multiple, but really, you are becoming more one” (the parallel to increasing number of arms of a stellation looking more and more like a sphere should be obvious to the reader). “You feel like you’re becoming more multiple, with all of these aspects of your personality coming to the fore, now, but really what is happening is there’s becoming a great balance across all of these different aspects of your personality, and you’re being forced to confront all of them more or less at once. The suggestion here is to just continue, allow, but give yourself a lot of grace, and continue forward as this massively multiplex stellation becomes, eventually, a sphere.”

That’s it. There’s not much here that they wanted to go over. They understand the circumstances, and that this is difficult, they’re just showing me, once again, me closing in on the realm of Adam Qadmon. “Only five Aethyrs after this,” they’re telling me, “and then after this, it will just be a matter of learning how to balance or, if necessary, be imbalanced across the elements, in order to achieve ultimate balance. You yourself will become more variable and adaptable, like unto the Tao.”

I’m very grateful to the angels for this. I ask if they or the Most High, in their great mercy and generosity, have anything further. They say no: “Be kind, be gentle unto yourself, even if it means not necessarily typing this up tonight” [spoiler: I did not].

I thank the angels for their time and generosity. Thus ends the vision.

Gebofal, Day 23

Sunrise: Call to Aethyr of ZID. Call to King Blumaza; Governors Zamfres, Todnaon, and Pristac; and Zodiacal Kings Gebabal, Olpaged, and Zarzilg.

I have compassion towards all I see. Now I see a white door; the door bends back into a spherical form, as a reminder of what needs to be done in terms of compassion towards suffering. I see the psychedelically colored sphere of fixed stars, and now I see it turn into an eyeball (which I’ve seen many times in these post-ZIP Aethyrs), which is reminiscent or often one of hundreds upon the Whale of God.

God is saying directly to me now: “This will become an increasingly purified vision of the spheres of Binah, Chokmah, and of Kether, and ultimately of the spheres of Adam Qadmon. Listen very closely now, my Son.” And I see a 3D stellation, a preview of the future Aethyrs (or a review of them, as I’ve been through the Aethyrs before). It’s like God is showing me this, and (my speech becomes rapid now) I’m within this eye, this psychedelic eye. And this stellated sphere is like unto the force of Chokmah, and it’s causing all of these different colors to appear (within the eye), and yet it is also reflecting them, but as one gets closer and closer in their approach to Kether, to LIL, then the stellation becomes even more so and more spherical, and ultimately rounded and more and more like unto the perfection of Kether itself. And these Two become One: yea, the Mind and Heart of God become as one.

The energy of this sphere is much higher than I recall it being, requiring much more concentration! I am compressing in all subsequent Aethyrs (except LIL) here. I see a cylinder rotating across the edge of a disc at an angle, scraping as it goes. These are the two forces again, Binah and Chokmah, and yet their interaction in this way is a reflection of Kether itself, which itself is all it can be on account of the world of Adam Qadmon. I see the motion of Chokmah; it becomes like unto a torus (note that a cylinder can be curved into a torus). It rotates into itself, becoming spherical. The disc itself also becomes a torus, and both of them rotate about themselves in this manner, becoming a double-joined sphere unto itself.

I’m having compassion for my ignorance and confusion, and I allow the fullness of this rainbow body to appear. The Divine seizes upon this and says, “All of this motion is the rainbow body. All of this vision is the rainbow body. Everything like unto what you have ever seen is like unto the rainbow body. This force, something that must become accepted within all of you, throughout, throughout your entire being: know this, that, yea, even the struggles that you’re feeling right now continue to be a mark of PRONOA of the Divine upon you. And so, continue your best, continue this effort, continue to work through everything so that you may know this PRONOA in its fullness. For, yea, one who knows this PRONOA in its absolute fullness need do nothing else, for one liveth continuously in the Love of the Divine.”

I ask the angels whether they have anything else. They say, “No, the Divine Himself has spoken to you! We dare not say anything in addition to this.”

With that, the vision ends.

Noon: Similar procedure. I began recording before having called on the zodiacal kings and governors, but that has been addressed.

I crank up the compassion as much as I can for everything about me, including the grand principles from the previous vision. Once again I see this stellated star, and I ask the angels, “Please, what have you all to show me?” and the star seems to come toward me, and then float away, but then towards me again, and away again.

I see this stellation revolving about what appears to be a black hole. The message is that this is the portal into the realm of Adam Qadmon, and that there is unbounded light within. “Think of a black hole, how there is infinite [i.e., measureless/maoffas] light within it: for indeed, none can escape.” I find this very interesting, and it really touches my heart in this interesting way. This is a resolution between the force of Ain (and indeed, black holes have much force to them!), and yet, at the same time, there is infinite light within it (for all intents and purposes). If one were to enter a black hole, one would experience “infinity,” so to speak.

I think about what it would be like to enter this, and I see myself stretching out like spaghetti. However, there is some part of my heart that really wants to be guided by this experience of entering the black hole. This is “beyond the beyond” in this way. I decide to try to generate compassion. “How can one circulate the infinite?” is the question that comes to me. “How can one circulate the infinite,” the question repeats.

“How can one circulate the infinite?”

I have no words for this. “Indeed there are no words, Son of Man, Son of God, Son of Earth.” “How can one circulate the infinite,” I repeat the question. “The Infinite already is, and therefore, it need not be circulated. Indeed, one only needs to be magnetized to it.” This seems simpler to my mind and to my heart, and I simply allow such magnetism to be.

And that seems to be the answer. Instead of doing, one simply allows itself to be as it is. There’s this long, infinite line which emerges from this reflection, and it tends to want to wrap itself into a circle, but indeed, it is infinite! And it is only bound within this circular frame, but if one were to enter it [as it is], then one would become like this line of spaghetti that Stephen Hawking talked about.

This is very wonderful! This is the portal into the realm of Adam Qadmon; it’s showing up and looming larger with each advance along this path. I express my gratitude. It’s as if everything is indescribable.

“And that is enough,” the angels say. Here ends the vision.

Sunset: Similar procedure.

The pace is picking up, and this is a highly metaphorical vision. Between the last session and this, I note that the colors of a rainbow as a whole must exist as measureless light which is unseen due to the gravity of a black hole, and of course this should have a parallel in the infinite light in the world of Adam Qadmon. The angels encourage me, saying, “Yes! Now consider how this dynamic of light, of stellation (of later Aethyrs), and ultimately of sphericity (of LIL) should continue like this, within this black hole.” Specifically: “Consider the clouds”–of flashing colors of LIL, within which hovered a silver sphere–“and how these represent this amorphous, difficult-to-grasp, intangible, this ‘how-can-I-even-get-here’ light from a black hole! Because one can’t actually go in there,”–here the angels return Adam Qadmon–“because it’s infinite, and one would lose oneself [as merging with a cloud]: one would dissipate.

“Yet one wouldn’t actually dissipate! This is the Infinite Source: this is the source of All Things. This is the reflection which the sphericity must bind itself in, in order to Know Itself most deeply!”

I’m trying to remain magnetized to the line to the portal to Adam Qadmon, and compassionate. The angels remind, “This lotus-rose symbol will be a servant to you.” I ask the angels in particular how might this wonderful world of Adam Qadmon also be compressed into this symbol, and recall aloud how the angels are represented by the bee upon the portal to the world of Adam Qadmon, which is within the blossom of the flower.

The angels say, “Is not the very magic the finding of the space which allows All Things To Happen?” The angels refer to the stamen and pistil of a flower, which allows for reproduction to occur, and all of this happens due to a good amount of space and its correct configuration, for this perfect unfolding to occur. If one were to compress the Vast Infinitude of the world of Adam Qadmon within this symbol: it is of the nature of the flower to reproduce itself, and to be constructed such that all of that can happen. Here the angels dwell on King Bynepor of the Heptarchy who, being associated with the expansive and reproductive powers of Jupiter, is also hailed as first among the equals of the Heptarchical kings.

Here I see a line moving through this space of the flower, but it seems to curve. The infinitude of the world of Adam Qadmon strikes my consciousness–and here I once again try to remain in accord with the straight line toward the world of AQ, and the angels exhort me: “Just stay magnetized to the straight line, don’t try to force it! If you are magnetized toward it, then the entire path that you follow in life is essentially curved. It is only curving about the many spheres of individual consciousnesses that you travel through.

“You are traveling about the spheres that other individual beings find themselves in. They may consider those spheres to actually be Black Iron Prisons, or they may consider them to be like unto the rules of correct living [e.g., a white cube] in order to be a good person, or just trying their best to do the right thing, trying to ‘paint the outside white.’

“Yet the point of all of this is that the straight line whereby all of us actually walk–if you were to place this about the Great Sphere of All Consciousness, then we are all actually merely following a straight line [i.e., the shortest distance between two points on a sphere]. If we just magnetized ourselves to the overall straight line [of the world of Adam Qadmon], suddenly, every single thing that happens in our life is to be detached from, or to be experienced but not suffered, or to be suffered but to be suffered gladly, because there is no resistance to the path that one is already on.” By this, in so doing, in fully surrendering to this line, I’m being shown rainbows from earlier today, and I’m being shown that in fully surrendering to this line, the natural self is always being bowed to, and so one truly is an Ipsissimus.

The angels say that this is enough; there’s more that could be delved into, but this is for the higher Aethyrs. The angels note just how much I’m compressing across vast chunks of Aethyrs right now; the angels are gaining speed, as it were, and all of this consciousness is dilating and expanding at the same time, “so everything that you need to wrestle with as a human being is presented to you and there are patterns and your mind is able to do skip-logic out to a later lesson, and it must be dealt with as it thus naturally arises.”

Thus ends the vision.

Gebofal, Day 19

Sunrise: Call to Aethyr of LOE (“Low E”). Call to King Bynepor.

The angels unfold the same fan from previous visions, and show a spiral within it, the same symbol as yesterday. They’re not adding to it yet, they say. I try not to be overly distracted. I pour out lovingkindness. Now the fan is 3D, and the angels say to extend the fan out in all seven dimensions that I’ve seen thus far, which I do, and they suggest an 8th and a 9th (the Ogdoad, the Ennead, and the Decad). Getting through to the other side, they say, is getting beyond these seven dimensions and into the eighth through tenth via Binah, Chokmah, and Kether, respectively. The eleventh, they say, is the world of Adam Qadmon, writ large.

The angels say that to shoot for the world of Adam Qadmon is great, and they’re trying to develop a means, a subtle body with a realization that can do this. The angels say not to define this by the negative: right now my mind needs to concentrate a lot in order to step past the abyssal nature of much of what I’m seeing, but this will be beyond that and transcend it. I maintain this poise, but I see the same cross from a previous scrying session in ZIP, extending out a bit. In that vision, I saw a cross like unto the 3D Cartesian axes, light blue in color and with electric kinds of hairs emerging from it. Now it’s extended out like unto the elongated rhombus, pale yellow or beige in color, with more lightning-like electricity rather than simply hairs:

Rhombus with electricity as described above–electricity shown only on one length for simplicity’s sake.

The angels suggest that I incorporate this into the symbol from yesterday’s vision, which is proving to be a little difficult for me at this point. This increasingly complex nature that gets revealed after the Abyss is not lost on me (unfortunately I’m unsure whether I’ll be able to do my best work here, but let me see):

Unifying both previous symbols

The angels are really going for it here. They say that the elaboration here is important in one degree, but in another way it is not. Someone can grok this via following the steps to realization. It’s sort of embedded in the earth, but sort of coming off of it; the four arms come down to create the sectioning such as with orbs held by monarchs:

Globus cruciger, colors not exact.

I see the colors in a pastel yellow or a beige, and the angels say that this is because it’s the empowered Ain Sof Aur. All of this, the lightning, is shown without the means of manifestation, it’s a more raw representation. The angels remind me to try to see this as not just Ain Sof Aur, but also Ain (emptiness or the empty mind, which is unbounded) and Ain Sof. I try to see this with the heart of compassion, and BANG! it’s like I’m sucked up into it! It reminds me of the effect of the Tardis floating around in Doctor Who (I don’t watch the show, don’t email me about this).

This itself proves to be a distraction, which I compassionately push past. The angels take me up into this Adam Qadmon realm. I comment about the importance of concentration and compassion as I’m taken up. The angels end the vision somewhat abruptly, saying that this is the limits of the Aethyr that I’m in, and that these limitations will all go away when I get to the final day of gebofal. I feel very much changed by this, which is of interest since this is still technically a pre-abyssal aethyr, but I may be biased on account of having already traversed the aethyrs before.

Noon: Similar procedure.

Right away, I’m pulled up, and I maintain compassion throughout. I see a skirt (in a safe-for-work sense), of a woman, kind of a casual 50’s style, and she’s twirling and being treated very well. The skirt is dark, and has some reddish upon it, and is like blood vessels going into a tissue. This is fractal, and these vessels all seem to originate from a heart. Again, this imagery of the heart, and I’m told this heart feels like a heart that is dancing, full of joy and wonder, ensconced in a being who is dancing.

This is Babalon, this is Binah, the angels tell me, and She is dancing and joyous, and She is treated like a Lady, as an equal being, as an entity worthy of love and affection and adoration, which of course She is. I’m having compassion for everything about me, Her included, the entire room and the context She is in. She extends her hand to me, and this is the Courtship of today, tomorrow, and Saturday, until Sunday in which She may be revealed. This, I’m told, is why King Bobogel was said, because he is of the sun, and in some ways the counterpart to her, he is said to hold all dear.

We begin dancing. It’s the sort of ballroom dancing you would expect in a casual environment. There are people around me who are clapping, and I extend love in all directions. Now there’s this gigantic, beautiful axe which comes down through the room and splits it and us into halves, and we all return again to our form and split apart again. I’m having love for even the axe and this splitting.

This is Ain, this is the force of Ain, and I see this as a beautiful vibration. I begin twirling up, (I emphatically declare as I see): “AS IF I AM HER, BUT I AM ALSO ME, AND WE/I, WE/I BEGIN TO ASCEND, AND SHE KISSES THIS FORM AND LIFTS ME UP AND BIDS ME FAREWELL, IN THE FULLNESS OF HER LOVE, AND I AM LIKE UNTO A SPIRAL AS I ASCEND IN THIS MANNER, AND I SEE STARS ABOUT ME.

“I SEE COLORS FROM THIS FORM, AND I SEE MYSELF SPINNING, YEA, SPINNING, AS I ASCEND FARTHER AND FARTHER, AND I HAVE REACHED THE PATH OF THE FIXED STARS, AS I APPROACH THEM, LIKE UNTO A ROCKET, LIKE UNTO THE SPINNING OF A GORGEOUS ROCKET, LIKE UNTO THE MOTION OF A METEORITE-IN-REVERSE, ASCENDING INTO THE HEAVENS, BOUND BY THE FORCE OF MY OWN MAGNETISM, LIKE UNTO THE CONSTANT CORKSCREW MOTION OF A PHOTON, AS I MYSELF APPROACH THE FIXED STARS, WHICH HAVE THEMSELVES, UNTO ME, SHONE THEIR LIGHT IN MY DIRECTION. SO I, TOO, APPROACH THE FIXED STARS IN THIS MANNER, AND IT IS UNLIKE ANYTHING I HAVE BEHELD BEFORE, AND YEA! EVEN MORE SHALL BE OPENED UNTO ME!

“YEA, THIS CRACKING WIDE OPEN SHALL CONTINUE UNTO THEE, SON OF MAN, SON OF GOD, SON OF EARTH, AS THOU HAST TAKEN THY FULLNESS OF THE DRAUGHT THAT WAS AVAILABLE UNTO ME IN BOLDNESS: YEA, AUDACITY! BUT IT IS LIKE UNTO THEE! AND IT IS PLEASING UNTO THE LORD TO HAVE MADE THEE LIKE THIS! AND SO THOU SHALT TAKE THE FULLNESS OF THY DRAUGHT, AND THOU SHALT KNOW THE FULLNESS OF THIS WILL, THE POWER OF THE WATERS, YEA, AND THE POWER OF THE FIRES CONTAINED THERIN! AND THOU SHALT CONTINUE ABOUT THIS PATH. AND YEAH, IN FULLNESS, SHALT THOU BECOME ALL OF THE FIXED STARS THEMSELVES, AND YEA, SHALT THOU BECOME ALL WITHIN ALL, FOR GOD HATH APPOINTED THEE TO THIS.”

The vision ends, and I am out of breath.

Sunset: Similar procedure. Note: I was extra energized this evening, as my restored health, and the knock-on effects of the prior vision, intoxicated me a bit.

I feel as though I am breathing in the room I am physically sitting in, and it seems to bend towards me during the inhalation and away as I exhale. There’s a biological feel to the vision. I see a V, which is the outline two lungs. I’m within Binah right now. She asks me to contemplate the Temperance card for a moment. Unfortunately for a bit I get sidelined, as the Strength card comes to mind; this reflects my chart but is an error. I have the presence of mind to confirm the Strength card and when I do, Binah‘s word, “Temperance,” rings in my ear again (dispersion is an error in these Aethyrs–always check your understanding, kids!). So I make all the correct associations with the Strength card, but after the correction, I do the same task for Temperance. This is an excellent symbol for the HGA, as the classical elements are clearly balanced here, and the exalted solar suggestion of a rising sun (note that the sun is still in its sign of exaltation). I note two lily flowers in the background and take them to be signs of enlightenment.

I pause to take in two long breaths, an 8-8-16 and a 9-9-18. During this interlude, I have visions of cartoonish characters, homeless, who melt like wax figures into rainbow puddles. It’s vaguely disturbing.

The symbolism of how the preceding relates to the following is left as an exercise to the reader:

I try to stay poised and true to the compassion of the heart again. Now I see Babalon in a Shakti-like form, many-armed, but now I correct myself and think she may be Kali, but now she seems more like Lilith, and she seems to take on a serpentine form and she multiplies, encircling me. I express compassion towards the rules causing Her to appear before me in this manner. This reminds me of my asking people about alienation on Twitter recently, and how Lilith was this figure, especially when in the social astrological houses. I continue to have compassion for the rules bringing me here and her here together like this. There’s this strange friction, and I see incredible light being achieved as a result. It looks like photographs of vast galaxies.

I call on the angels for help with interpretation. The angels point out that it’s like the galaxy existing in the way it is right now is coming up against all of the possibilities that could not come into existence. There’s this massive tension between all the possibilities such as they aren’t (all the possibilities that could have been available to us now), and all the possibilities such as have been actualized to this point. And it’s like these possibilities are yelling at me now: “Have compassion throughout! Have compassion for all of these things! Have compassion in your heart for all the possibilities that are not, and all the possibilities that are! Have compassion across all of these!” There’s this very angry feeling, and I’m trying my best, and focusing past the immediate tension to the root cause of all of this, and the root cause of the compassion that I want to have. And this is what I really want to unfold–right now!

And why isn’t it happening?!

And there’s this raw rage emerging, and now something is trying to escape out of my heart, and I don’t know what this is, and it’s trying very hard! And I’m seeing a bunch of armor, and there seem to be two characters, male and female, fighting against each other. The tension continues to rise as I plead with them: “This is real! This is OK! And you are real, too, for wanting it to not be so! And it’s OK!” And…and…it’s like something is trying to be borne from my heart, and … and… it’s like a lily, and a different flower shooting up from the center of the blossom of the previous one, and the last one is…is…it’s not quite a lotus, it’s a…what is this? It’s a lotus-rose fusion, which has these thorns in it. I declare, “It springs from mud, and is painful to touch, and yet it is beautiful and necessary to be held in this way, and if it is understood in this manner, then in such a manner will all be at rest, who hold it.”

And the angels hold me, and ask me to come to terms with this, such as it is. And they know this will take a while. It is awe-inspiring, and it has sprung from my heart. And I’ve been holding my heart, and if my heart gives birth to this, then it is good, and I will hold it. So I feel it scratch my face, and I hold it like an infant, and it scratches my face as it does so, and the scent it gives off is so sweet.

And I feel very blessed. “Nothing more today.” The vision ends.

Gebofal, Day 15

Sunrise: Call to Aethyr of LEA (lee-ay). Call to King BOBOGEL, as with previous entries.

I see some darkness, and I see black square which is rotated about into a black sphere. It’s like the angels are showing a candle within the black sphere, and are saying that there’s a tendency within previous conditioning from life to turn into a dark attitude and identifying with the ego. The importance here is to remember that force (Ain) which allows such to be contextualized into a black sphere, such that the white cube can be placed about it.

The tendency of these seven Aethyrs are to try to do everything in its power to undo the black sphere, which, again, is the metaphor for a contextualization of suffering in the mind back into egotistical thinking, back into egotistical thinking. My mind alights back to the three sephiroth in the World of Creation on the Tree of Life: Tiphareth, Geburah, and Chesed. The problem is that these Aethyrs are like unto the planets without the sephiroth, the angels advise. Imagine someone with strong, willful energy of the ego: Jupiter, Mars, and the sun, but without any contextualization within the sephiroth of mercy, power (which is aligned with the universe), and beauty (the beauty by which the ego can properly expand and be aligned with the universe).

I vibrate the names of Governors Sochial, Cucarpt, and Lavacon, and of King Bobogel. I see the top of a white cube, and the angels are saying that I have to work hard during this week to maintain those habits which allow the proper contextualization of the ego. For example, they point out the Noble Eightfold Path.

I feel some energy about my head. It seems to me like unto a psychic surgery to the minor chakras as well as to my sahasrara chakra.

The vision ends.

Noon: The angels are showing the black sphere, which is cut vertically and rotated around to show a white sphere about it. They’re trying to show it, partly like a coin, but also like the white sphere of compassion within it. The angels are quite particular here: there is compassion to be had, which can unfold from suffering–the reaction to suffering, when done intelligently and with great Wisdom, such as that provided by the Most High (indeed, whence all wisdom comes) leads one to the path of this transparent sphere of compassion.

The angels show this up/down and front-back twisting and whipping around of halves of a sphere, connected by a central point. The angels say that this is what is going on right now. The black sphere is trying very hard, and it’s like this compassion which I’m bringing back is very foreign to it. It’s not happy about it, but I’m also trying to not get caught up in it’s game. I call on the governors and king again. I ask for any assistance to gather a higher lesson from this.

The angels show me the black cube with a white cube set about it. The white cube overlays the black cube, they show me: instead of being caught in a structure which guarantees our suffering, we instead overlay a structure of wisdom and understanding–all of which is driven and reflected by the light of Ain, which is overlaid on top of the suffering wherein we find ourselves. This structure (i.e., a method) allows us to contextualize it and to grow, such as I’m experiencing now. So this is overlaid atop the suffering.

The suffering which can happen to a heart, when acted upon foolishly or out of ignorance, can cause a warping of the heart, and takes it first out of the transparent state (which is to say, the ability to meet a being from a place which can meet them as they are). Then it can take them out of the spherical state as the heart becomes defined by suffering, coming to believe that suffering has a rigid structure which it cannot break out of, such as learned helplessness.

This view is false.

These are extraordinary lessons. The angels show me the taijitu. The Western approach (generally speaking) of squaring is partly correct, and the taijitu is also partly correct. “Now,” they say, “you’re seeing a means for right moral living.”

I see the twisting once more, which they contextualize with the twisting of the snake about me from earlier visions, which was work on my energetic subtle body. Now they ask me to speak at a deeper level to that which I’ve learned so far. Here I do a standard thing, which is to speak directly with the rules which have caused this state of affairs. A lot of voices begin speaking to me at once, at which point I organize them and say, “There’s got to be some underlying rule here,” at which point I hear, “This is the nature of dimensionality.”

Here my bodily awareness cannot be ignored. I’ve felt a slight pinprick pressure on the back of my neck which cannot be explained by my clothes. It’s just to the right, so I speak directly to this part of my subtle body. “What’s going on? What do you have to say? What is going on here? I feel like you’ve had something to say for a while.” I ask my holy guardian angel (HGA) in particular to help mediate this discussion for me.

My HGA says that this is kind of difficult: it’s going to be a huge download all at once. I assent and ask for a three-count before it happens: at “three,” I see before me the golden Borg cube again (if the Borg are the shadow, then this is the light version of them). There’s a big unfolding; the angels say that the Borg is a massive fractal concept; we’re all kind of linked in with each other. The thing that made it a nightmare was the loss of identity, but in this version there’s merely hyperintimacy (note that humanity has been making this decision collectively via technological advancement and surveillance).

Within the cube, I see a checkerboard: “Think of this both in a binary sense, as well as a board game. If you think of a chessboard or a Go board, there’s all of these ones and zeroes: occupied vs. not occupied, white or black, etc.” There are also all of these transitional states determining whether a given piece is (or ever can be occupied) in this manner.

There’s something really deep here that someone (I’m not speaking the angels here, including my HGA) does not want me to see. It’s like I’m seeing a big wave come at me within this cube, a swirling wave like one sees a surfer ride. It reminds of approaching the fixed stars, and the motion thereof, except now the fixed stars themselves are coming at me and trying to reach. I see three to five of them. This water comes in: it’s very pure. Part of me wants to bump out of me when the water hits me, but I’m holding fast within the cube, and merely having that force give me an expansive and inclusive view of whatever’s most helpful of the advancing of all beings towards understanding and ending collective suffering.

Recall that all of this is from the vision of me trying to understand this pressure at a point on my neck. Now this poking, itching energy moves down to between my right shoulder blade and my spine. I see this light coming in, like unto the Borg’s scanning or tractor beam light; it’s like there’s an incision at this point on my body, and there’s this faucet handle coming up out of it, giving me a level of control as to how much of the vision of the water to see. I let a drop out into a glass, and it’s intelligent and moving along to say, “I am but one portion of the ocean. There is much more to show to you. This much must wait until you are past the Abyss, and then the flood will come at you again, and it will be grander than this preview.”

That’s it, the vision wraps up really quickly. King Bobogel says that a week from now, it will be much clearer. I express my gratitude to the governors and king as the vision ends.

Sunset: Similar procedure: Reading the titles of Leaf 35, then the call to King Bobogel, then the call to the Aethyr of LEA.

I’m getting more energy than usual off of the leaf. I think about the drop of water from the previous vision and the faucet, and I turn the faucet up to give myself half a glass. It comes up energetically, trying to scare me; I get the sense that this is the general sense of the veil being unhappy with being pierced. But now it’s wrapping around me in a spiral, stretching me out, like the snake did in a previous vision.

I’m seeing myself like the character of Rick from Rick and Morty, which suggests I’m perhaps a little too bold and impatient, and this is probably true. Now I’m seeing myself like a character in a TV show who is going through an ordeal while standing: they throw their chest forward in agony, and I get the sense that this is the level of what’s going on with my subtle body as I’m working with the water. I have faith that I’ll be okay, and the angels do, also, and it’s as if the angels are suggesting this is the proper way to proceed, now that I’ve chosen this path.

I put my body in this posture. It’s like there’s this energy entering through my ajna chakra (third eye), which is circulating through me. When what is in me is to be cleansed is rinsed out in this process, it becomes part of this water. Now this water is filling up the golden cube, which is now about an eighth full. I get the sense that the amount of water it takes to fill up the cube is on a logarithmic scale.

Nonetheless, I decide to crank up the amount of water (9th house, malefic-out-of-sect-and-above-the-horizon Mars in Aries for the win). Now it’s like all of my subtle bodies are suffused with this water. Having done this, now I see Babalon sort of peeking from behind a seam in the sky. She’s waving and now I see why I wasn’t really to have taken on all of this water. It’s a little premature and the water was to have been taken on in ZAX and ZIP, but nonetheless I’m in LEA and so closing in on that Aethyr.

As my subtle body walks around, it’s like there’s this heaviness; I’m burdened with the weight of this preview of Her, and it won’t dissipate until I see Her in Her fullness in ZIP. I see a wall pulled down from the side of a room which I’m on the other side of, and there’s a torrent of water. There’s a lot of weight and force to it. The metaphor, the angels say, is for the reason for the stepwise nature of these Aethyrs. The angels say I’m okay to do it because I’ve already scried all of the Aethyrs (I note that I need to check any ego-delusion) and on account of that experience and the development of my subtle bodies to go through this. The metaphor is like drinking too much before sleep and then having to pee at night. The angels say I’ll have to carry this burden until I cross the Abyss again.

The angels take me into the heavens once more, the seam in the sky and Victorival’s work. The beings are coming through the seam very quickly and taking refuge in the water of my subtle body. Whatever it is, this has a lot of implications. The angels say that as I develop, my subtle body vessel will be able to accommodate many more beings. It will behave both as a magnet and a holding station.

I see something like unto a multicolored plant; it seems to have some kind of intelligence. It’s kind of confused and trying to understand what’s going on with me. The angels say to hold off on interacting with this being, so I ask it to wait, and it agrees. I get the sense that the entity is like unto a Chokmah entity, and the angels hint that such is likely the case. The angels have nothing further, and the vision ends.

Gebofal, Day 7

Sunrise: Call to Aethyr of NIA. I call BNAPSEN via the prayer as listed in Stenwick’s Mastering the Mystical Heptarchy, but not using the Enochian calls.

The angels show me seven points, and of course today, being the last day of the first week, their meaning is described: the points are placed along the outermost ring of a spiral. The remaining 42 days work their way through to the center of the spiral. On Day 49, the last portion of that spiral can be connected via three points of a line segment (for you can further subdivide the spiral to account for the same call three times on each of the days of the ritual, which is to say 147 points in all). This line segment connecting the final stretch of the spiral can be thought to start at the reading of Leaf 1b, ending at the reading of Leaf 1a, and the finally, on the evening of the final day, reading of the leaf in its entirety, at which point the center is made manifest. Note: this reduces the role of error which one would surely have by attempting to find the center by starting at the outside of such a spiral.

King BNAPSEN mentions that blogging about this is how a particular method of gebofal can be handed down, thus fulfilling his Binah/Saturn role. A cooperative effort to publish copies of Amzes Naghezes Hardeh with this method is suggested to me.

I point the wand at Leaf 43b; King BNAPSEN and Governors Orcanir, Chialps, and Soageel are unfolding the structure of what is going on as I scry during the gebofal ritual, which is helpful and appeals to my luminary-trined Saturn. I’m given more information and meaning now that I’ve hit Day 7, the end of the first seven days. I ask explicitly about the symbol; now that I’ve been reconciled with all of the planets, the symbol can now come forth. They show a spiral beginning at the outside of the four-pointed star, and to have the point at which the square (which is suggested by the diamond) would be circled (i.e., a circle overlapping the square have the same area), have that be at the 3.5 mark of a seven-“circle” spiral; to help visualize it, I’ve shown it below:

The same symbol from yesterday, this time with a spiral of seven revolutions; the point of revolution 3.5 is shown in red, indicating the circumference of a circle which would have the same area as the square suggested by the four points of the diamond. Decorative lotus leaves could be added along spiral.

I see rays coming down about me, and they relate to the rainbow body. They say that my mind and heart is relating better to the subtle body and therefore the rainbow body can be emerge and be more realized over time.

Noon: Similar procedure.

I comment on noticing the Leaf 43a is the first of these early leaves with its own corner and row that doesn’t have every other letter missing. I’ve filled in a few of these based on my intuition (but don’t claim them to be the be-all, end-all). I call on the angelic king BNAPSEN & governors Orcanir, Chialps, and Soageel, and they mention that there’s a parallel to ZAX and the Abyss, as well as to Ain (of the world of Adam Qadmon), which is the reverse of the spelling of this Aethyr. This, they mention, is the preview of Leaf 1 on day 49. There’s more depth to these Aethyrs than one would otherwise give credit for, so what I’m doing now is following the septenary spiral inward to its logical conclusion.

The angels instruct me to place the face of the PELE ring on the front of Leaf 43, which the book is opened to. To do so, I put the PELE ring on a finger on my left hand so that it can continue to touch the book. However, I naturally place the back of the hand upon the leaf rather than turning the ring around so that my palm remains on it. They joke about the trope of sci-fi shows to somehow “reverse the polarities” to get the reverse effect of a problem they’re trying to solve via the normal polarization. Still, there’s something to be said about this (and typing this up, I’m thinking the message that things can’t be “unchanged,” but rather changed again in an attempt to honor the previous arrangement). They are “reversing the polarities” (i.e., King BNAPSEN is reversing some of what King BYNEPOR Thursday–note that astrologically, Saturn is the great malefic while Jupiter is the great Benefic; Saturn is only half of Jupiter’s mass and so can’t undo all of it). The angels tell me to get used to this push-pull, and that this will happen several times, and why these two planets are spaced a day apart on the days of the week. I’m told that this is the nature of what happens when one is placed at the center, and why the meaning of visions can seem to reverse or change meaning. A little vibration or wave can be completely disorienting, and things can suddenly seem upside down or reversed with only a little movement.

I can see a 3D funnel-like spiral come up from the palm of my hand. They begin by showing me a 2D version of the spiral (such as that above). Then they have me look at the funnel as instead a spherical version, which reminds me of a a tennis ball which a dog has chewed, causing it to come undone at the seams, which can be looped around itself. If the inner part of the seam were smaller, then it can be looped around itself in a spiral-like manner. Then the angels tell me to contemplate this in 4D space; they hint that the geometry I will see may be too much to interpret directly.

King BNAPSEN mention that the allergy drugs I’m on have helped to make the restructuring of my subtle body easier. I see a lot of waves; this is like when an ultrasound loosens up knots in a physical body. “Behold his wonders.”

The vision ends.

Inter-scrying commentary: So, believe it or not, I’ve not read the entirety of Dee’s Monas Hieroglyphica until just now, though I’ve seen the commentary offered by Dr. Justin Sledge and Jason Louv. I also already knew that symbol by heart. A few points of contrast between his symbol and mine:

First, the spiral: his spiral naturally closes, mine remains open.

Second, is the symbol of the Tao is central, while the cross is separated from the symbol of the elements (as indicated by the divided diamond). The cross carries with it the meaning of the unfolded cube, which is the unfolding of the heart.

Third, the elements are placed along the outside rather than central to the symbol. This is important to need to balance oneself among the four elements.

Sunset: Similar procedure.

Once again, I’m shown the seven dots. The angels show me a more basic binary version of his Theorem:

The angels are saying that this is a more basic and binary form of the Monas Hieroglyphica: 20, 21, and 22, in which can be seen the force and power of Ain, as well as the natural progression leading to a 2 and a 3 (20 + 21 = 1 + 2 = 3). They show me this binary and ask me rhetorically to merge this concept with getting to a total of seven (by adding all the dots); the angels note that one gets from 7 to 15 to 31 to 63, each of which is its own form of sacredness (7 being the number of the classical astrological planets, fifteen being the sum of any Saturn square, 31 being the name of El in Gematria, and 63 being 7*9, with 9 having its special importance to Enochian as I’ve gone over in previous posts). 127 is prime and (credit to Wikipedia; float them some money, will you?) is the smallest prime that can be written as the sum of multiple consecutive odd-numbered primes: 127 is the smallest prime that can be written as the sum of the first two or more odd primes: 127 = 3 + 5 + 7 + 11 + 13 + 17 + 19 + 23 + 29, and is the sum of the sums of the divisors of the first 12 positive integers (78 is the sum of those numbers, so 11 (for the 1’s for the first 12 numbers, except 1 itself, which is already included for the number 1) then add 2, 2, 3, 2, 4, 3, 2, 5, 2, 3, 4, 6). The angels kind of want me to stop here. The angels want me to stop here as we’ve reached 27 – 1.

Taking this splitting to its normal extension, they say consider when 7 & 15 meet up opposite each other: 4 four match each other, the other four of the final row of 8 do not. If 7 and 31 meet, 4 would match each other, 12 would not. If 7 and 63 met, then 4 would meet and 28 would not. They say it has something to do with what is left over, and something about exponents. However, I’m not following a lot of the logic. I call on King BNAPSEN and Governors Orcanir, Chialps, and Soageel again. They have me pause to center and say they’re going to show me. 128 + 7 sums to 135, which is 9*15; I’m still confused because they’re switching what gets added up. They say “hold on,” and they comment that this is 27 + 7. Then they have me add 7 + 28 = 263, which is Resh, the solar letter, plus 63, which is the number already have from 26 – 1. They mention 519 but then they stop. They say to add one less than the power of 2 to a different power of 2 which is larger. They say that 519 will be telling to me. They call this my homework.

The angels have me wait. King BNAPSEN shows me the letter V which can be oriented as a 7 in Arabic numerals but in Roman numerals is 5, so together this is 12. He shows me the sun being exalted astrologically being a symbol of an exalted heart. The angels tell me to set my wand on the Holy Table and to put both hands together in prayer on both sides of the leaf, which creates an interesting energy.

I do a quick prayer asking for mercy. The angels show me a lotus flower, and show me a moon within it (note that this combination is also symbolic of the Buddhist bodhisattva deity Tara). The angels ask me to change the foot on which the BNAPSEN seal is located, so I do, crossing my legs to do so, such that my posture is reminiscent of the posture of certain martyrs and, I note, to The Hanged Man in the Tarot. I concentrate on these two images together, The Hanged Man and the lotus flower with the moon inside of it. He’s now inverted, so upright and his hair floats upward. The angels tell me to accustom myself to inversion.

The Hanged Man rising up up out of the lotus reminds me of the mantra, Om Mani Padme Hum, the lotus-jewel. The Hanged Man being number XII of the major arcana adds significance, and of course this is actually the 13th trump (since the numbering of the major arcana starts with 0, The Fool). This gives significance to the Watchtowers, which are 12×13 in dimension, thus coming to 156 letters per watchtower. I’m looking into the heart of this inverted hanged man, and the angels tell me that if I take his foot to instead be standing upon the moon as it goes through simple harmonic motion. This motion could also be seen as him going through a circular motion, front-to-back and up-and-down, creating a circle around his heart about the y- and z-axes.

They make additional analogies; if the hanged man bows before something greater than himself, that’s a certain kind of eclipse, but stretching back in ecstasy is a different kind of eclipse. There’s something about aligning with the Saturn cycle.

Now I’m atop a cross which is in outer space, and which is flying like a spaceship. At times it seems like a TOPY cross, but there seem to be fractal extensions of 2/3 size which emerge from the cross, forming a pattern. I see myself lying on the cross, with my heart at the center, causing it to fan out in a fractal pattern. I’m told that networks such as these need to meet other people so that they can grow again and not peter out at the natural upper limit of the fractal pattern. It’s like I’m traveling through space, and the cross becomes many of the same size, forming a simple bridge down to a planet. I touch the planet which is like unto Mars, but touching it causes a bit of blue to appear, terraforming it. I don’t know what this is, but on reflection, it’s a symbol of following the perpendicular in order to meet the center, or heart (note the six-rayed star in the LRP is made up of red and blue triangles); at the time, one side of the leaf I’m holding was saying “this is obvious,” the other side of the leaf was saying, “it’s not obvious at all.

They’re showing me the sun and the moon crossing each other, which of course follows this symbolism. I note that there’s an upcoming lunar eclipse, which I mistakenly think is in June (it’s in May), but they’re really trying to point me towards it. I don’t know what this is, but it’s important to them, and I’m grateful for the message.

Several times now it’s felt like the vision will stop, but it resumes. Now I see a diamond shape, a rhombus, which has a size of a diagonal that is three times the size of the other. There’s an additional correction to the symbol, which now has three-dimensionality; the main one is shown atop and rotating above a self-similar square pyramid:

Now I recall a symbol on the astral appearing like this appearing after I scried the Aethyr of ZIP about a year and a half ago. It was made of gold and I was able to use it to help me decipher tables I received about this time. It was three-dimensional and octahedral; the angels show me another one today, this time even thinner:

“You have a square (from the original symbol), but held at this angle [in three dimensions], it has to look like a rhombus.” Ultimately they say that the fusion of the old symbol with this new one is a means to perfect it. There’s a flexibility with the height of the octahedron, which I’d already had from the ZIP symbol. The angels emphasize the self-similarity.

The symbol floating above the mountain is similar to it floating above itself in the pyramid form, and there’s significance about it but I’m not to know about it. “Think of it like Re atop mounting, but because it’s merely reflecting Re, it’s like unto the moon.” The symbol is reflecting light onto the ground below, and I’m thinking of Egypt. It’s lighting up the ground below, and they’re saying that it could reflect any place on Earth. “The light will hit a central point,” and the energy will be like a thermal solar tower. I’m unclear, but the angels say that this is okay: this is laying the structure for what will happen at the end of this ritual.

There’s something about a dog, but the vision ends.

Gebofal, Day 5

Sunrise: Similar procedure: Ave-quoted Prayer of Enoch, Heptarchical call to King BYNEPOR, vibration of title of Leaf 45b. Call to Aethyr of DES.

I sit and I feel swirling about my subtle body. The angels remind me of the 12 signs of the zodiac, and, with my having done 12 callings (three each to four lowest Aethyrs), I completed the first rotation. The angels say that they would like to do an invocation. They are noting a tension headache and I begin channeling King BYNEPOR.

“King BYNEPOR, King over all things Jupiterian: behold how you have seen me in your first house and how I return today, a Thursday. An auspicious time as I apply to your midheaven by sextile. Let us therefore begin.

Energy work in my subtle body centers commences: “Opening up the crown chakra, allowing for an expanding and unfolding of so much that has been hidden therein. The top of the head, all the way down the top [half] of the skull, and now deep within the brain itself: subtle! subtle! subtle! Lo, is the letter B within the word ‘subtle,’ and hath started all of our names: so, too shalt thou find this [process] to be subtle.

“All of the work that was done yesterday is hereby expanded unto the Glory of Him Who is the Highest, and the Lord of all Things. [I am] working this through, seeing through this expansion to all of its subtleties and all of the subtleties within your subtle body; expanding and amplifying and glorifying and taking to the higher octave all of the unfolding of the rainbow body within you.”

I have a tingling feeling at the tips of my middle and ring fingers, and it’s explained to me to adjust my hand so that it is dead center of Leaf 45b, thereby balancing the energy therein.

The internal emotional dance associated with fear: “Behold the color yellow…associated with fear [in the U.S.]. The expansion [of the heart into compassion], associated with and in response to fear, and often expanding the fear itself, and yet moving [in compassion] as if nothing were to be feared, though every single action is defined by the fear [via negativa]: such is normal! Such joy to be taken in such movement, for the dukkha is what indeed allows for a greater magnification [of] understanding of this dukkha, and this fear allows for a greater amount of compassion within the heart: so much greater the trust, despite the fear, as a result of such compassion, in order to overcome the matters of evil!

“A great rising up, a great expansion within you: it overwhelms your general inclination–allow it to, for the rainbow body is indeed a the birth of a new body, and can indeed be understood as such, as a new birth. Glory unto Him who is the Highest!”

A rapid vision of geometry is before me; I’m told to accept the garland of tessellation about me, and to keep it about me as a bridge of compassion for others. “One cannot unchange, one merely changes again in an attempt to emulate what was.”

King BYNEPOR closes: “Thy heart hath leaped out of its chest, but let us provide the springs in the shoes to allow it to leap even more, and higher, and fly out of the joys of thy compassion! … Bound as thou art to earth, thereby shalt thou display even greater joy and enfolding within the earth: lo, the torus of Tauruses.” BYNEPOR speaks of the earth termas being of Here is the mark of compassion, everlasting compassion, and the sign of the Most High. Therefore be thou now glad, a heart ever-leaping, and yea, flying, as the Most High hath allowed it to be: bound on earth, flying in heaven, and, yea, both of these in one being.”

The vision ends.

Noon: Same procedure except 45a instead of 45b. Call/Key to DES.

The angels make note of today’s allergies. King BYNEPOR makes note of issues with, and continues to make changes to, the subtle body. He asks me to remain still. He’s trying to draw an outline of all of the points of my body, creating a wireframe at the central lines/curves of representing my bones. He’s saying that this is how the subtle body is understanding itself to be. This is the subtle body working through the materia of existence.

He points to the heart, which is at the center of this wireframe, trying to understand its own existence, regardless of the actual form it may take. The angels ask me to contemplate the general feeling from this morning’s scrying. I’m feeling the general energy, and they tell me to note the energy as if a bunch of points were trying to understand itself, and the force of Ain which naturally arises as the absence of the connections brings about an attempt to connect these points together in a meaningful way.

The angels say that some days of this ritual won’t have as much. The energy is milder and “evening out.” They’re saying that even as there’s a fullness or completion to a “wireframe” of a subtle body coming into existence. There’s also a completion until the next rotation of the body coming together: the wireframe of the subtle body comes into union with the energy thereof into a movable system (i.e., an embodied soul). The angels remind me of this geometric folding and reconfiguration of the form in material form, in the form of reproduction, development, rising above material circumstance.

I try to concentrate past my emotional state. The angels are showing me in my dharana, which is quartered diagonally, and I get the sense that this is to be integrated into my personal symbol. The angels note my fatigue and have accommodated my state by foreshortening it. It’s not a hiccup as far as the ritual itself goes. The angels give me a mild admonishment for not taking as good enough care of my body & bipolar disorder, but also acknowledge that some of my current state was unavoidable. Sometimes, they say, it’s better for an Aethyr to be scried and for a calmer, more even version of it. They end the vision relatively early; I take much of the afternoon off and take a nap.

Sunset: Same procedure, reading both titles of Leaf 45; I’m instructed to sit, which is now a standing (heh) instruction. They have me lean back in the high-back chair.

The angels ask me to contemplate the wireframe and the energy coming off of the leaf, which is palpable. King BYNEPOR is roiling up the energy again; the call to him, he says, reflects “new people and new government,” and that the rainbow will be the new government of the unfolding of my soul.

I get flashes of children, playing at a playground on a sunny day. I’m overwhelmed by the vividness of the color, and the youthful energy of it. It’s as if I’m now a child, or seeing the world through a child’s eyes, as a parent does. The newness of springtime strikes me: the rainbow body will be like this renewal of life that a new parent has. I’m uplifted.

My focus is drawn to a shadow in the road; it is a black sphere in the road, and it is the dark side of Jupiter: taking life from the old to allow regeneration. What will be taken away, or I will need to eschew, is my reputation. I won’t be able to maintain a hermetic practice: it will need to open up and be more known. A new reputation will take its place.

I’m concentrating on a fear vibe from this shadow, which is like a portal into the Abyss; it doesn’t like being looked at! I look at it and concentrate on it anyway, much as one does in ZAX. It’s trying to conjure fear in my heart and distract me. At their roots, they are not to be feared, but just realized as being foolish and a general bummer. It’s within the white square, which is my dharana focus, which becomes a white cube. So we now have an inversion of the black cube of the Black Iron Prison and the silvery-white sphere I saw in LIL.

Knowing the core of suffering, and the root of fear, and doing so clearly, I will have a better sense of how to order my life and restructure things about me–in keeping with my orderly core, which is tough to see at first glance. The idea is to use spherical consciousness on the shadow itself. This is the “cubing of the sphere.” Thinking about this in terms of the symbolism of it being in the road, and the idea is to travel a road to get here and to travel a road to leave it in terms of timelines.

I see the cube unfold into a cross made of six squares, which create a pattern across the globe. Then it is unwrapped from the globe like gauze, and it’s as if a new earth appears underneath. I see my friend appear symbolically as the eye in the triangle within a circle, minus the conspiratorial angle. It’s reminiscent of a Jupiter transit.

The vision ends with a nice bouncy energy.